Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.2 9/18/84 exptools; site whuts.UUCP Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!burl!ulysses!mhuxr!mhuxt!houxm!whuxl!whuts!amc From: amc@whuts.UUCP (Andy Cohill) Newsgroups: net.singles Subject: Re: The "Reality" of Electronic Communication Message-ID: <369@whuts.UUCP> Date: Tue, 12-Nov-85 08:29:36 EST Article-I.D.: whuts.369 Posted: Tue Nov 12 08:29:36 1985 Date-Received: Wed, 13-Nov-85 21:06:16 EST References: <917@cvl.UUCP> <352@whuts.UUCP> <11@ttidcc.UUCP> <1617@teddy.UUCP> Distribution: net Organization: AT&T Bell Laboratories Lines: 35 > there is little threat of immediate negative feedback, it is also > possible to say things via writing that you would find very difficult > to say face-to-face. > ... I think that an important part of building a > real relationship is the development of a reflexive feeling a trust > between the two people. That's not an intellectual trust, but a deep > seated emotional trust. This sort of trust is not built thru > intellectual processes, but thru low level emotional ones, the kind > that are only activated thru personal contact. > ...The social skills of the net DO NOT CARRY OVER. > Larry Kolodney (INTERNET) lkk@mit-mc.arpa Hear, hear. I think that the net is a terrific thing, but I see as mostly a good place to be exposed to new ideas, not as a place to meet people (although that does happen). Call me old-fashioned, but I communicate with my close friends by hand, with a piece of paper and a pen. The physical act of writing is a wonderful filter--the work involved in writing makes me thing a lot longer about what I want to say and how I want to say it. Also, it tends to make you concentrate more on the things that really important to you. Lest anyone wonder, I am a touch typist, so it is not that I write things out longhand because I can't type. Even the telephone is better than email. I can learn so much more about someone by *listening* to them than I can by reading their email. I particularly pay attention to their laughter and the sound of their smile, and the wretched email smiley face is no substitute. Email certainly expands the potential for communication, but I will writing to *my* friends in longhand as long as I am able... Best regards, Andy Cohill {allegra|ihnp4}houxm!whuxl!whuts!amc