Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP
Posting-Version: version B 2.10.2 9/18/84; site tymix.UUCP
Path: utzoo!decvax!decwrl!Glacier!oliveb!tymix!whitehur
From: whitehur@tymix.UUCP (Pamela K. Whitehurst)
Newsgroups: net.women
Subject: Re: Otherwise Engaged
Message-ID: <570@tymix.UUCP>
Date: Tue, 12-Nov-85 12:30:31 EST
Article-I.D.: tymix.570
Posted: Tue Nov 12 12:30:31 1985
Date-Received: Thu, 14-Nov-85 01:45:45 EST
References: <632@oliveb.UUCP>
Reply-To: whitehur@tymix.UUCP (Pamela K. Whitehurst)
Distribution: na
Organization: Tymnet Inc., Cupertino CA
Lines: 47
Summary: 

In article <632@oliveb.UUCP> toml@oliveb.UUCP (Tom Long) writes:
>[]
>	I have just finished reading "Otherwise Engaged: the private lives of
>successful career women" by Srully Blotnick.  This book reports the results
>of a 25-year study of the lives of over 2000 women.  It touches on a lot of
>topics which have been debated in net.women.  The assertions made in the book
>are based on evidence, not just opinion, and many of them run counter to the
>general tenor of postings to this newsgroup.
>
>	A primary assertion is that when there is a conflict between marriage
>and career, those women who favor their marriage will do better in the long
>run that those women who favor their career.  Women who sacrifice marriage
>for a career tend to be seen by those around them (men and women) as driven,
>brittle, and moody.
 
I have not seen the book and would like some clarification.  What area of
life is better in the long run?  I think that when there is
a conflict between career and home life then attention needs to be paid to
the home life.  But, attention also needs to be paid to career goals.       
Conflicts are not resolved by consistently sacrificing one side for the
other. They are just delayed.

Since the book was about successful career women, did it look at women who
had sacrificed careers for marriage and as a result were not successful in
their career?  A woman who wants to have a career and a marriage needs to 
have a spouse who supports her career.  I suspect that women who have
successful careers and marriages have been willing to discuss and
compromise in both areas.

>	Another assertion is that women who identify men as the enemy are
>making a serious error.  They redirect anger with the attitudes of blue-collar
>men at the white-collar men who they work with and live with.  This anger
>has a negative effect on careers and marriages.

Identifying anyone as an enemy is a serious error.  Currently most of the
competition is male.  Since I cannot predict who I will need to be able to
work with in the future I see no value in needlessly antaganizing anyone.

PKW
-- 
          PKW
hplabs!oliveb!tymix!whitehur

+---------------------------------------+
| The thrill is not just in the winning |
|  But in the courage to join the race  |
+---------------------------------------+