Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP
Posting-Version: version B 2.10.2.fluke 9/24/84; site vax1.fluke.UUCP
Path: utzoo!linus!decvax!tektronix!uw-beaver!fluke!suz
From: suz@fluke.UUCP (Suzanne Jurgensen)
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: Deteriorata
Message-ID: <1244@vax1.fluke.UUCP>
Date: Thu, 31-Oct-85 12:25:04 EST
Article-I.D.: vax1.1244
Posted: Thu Oct 31 12:25:04 1985
Date-Received: Sun, 3-Nov-85 15:37:15 EST
Distribution: net
Organization: John Fluke Mfg. Co., Inc., Everett, WA
Lines: 63


			


			DETERIORATA

Go placidly amid the noise & waste, & remember what comfort there may
  be in owning a piece thereof.

Avoid quiet & passive persons unless you are in need of sleep.

Rotate you tires.

Speak glowingly of those greater than yourself and heed well their
  advice even though they be turkeys; know what to kiss and when.

Consider that two wrongs never make a right but that three do.

Wherever possible, put people on hold.

Be comforted that in the face of all aridity & disillusionment and
  despite the changing fortunes of time, there is always a big
  fortune in computer maintenance.

Remember the Pueblo.

Strive at all times to to bend , fold, spindle, & mutilate.

Know yourself; if you need help, call the FBI.

Exercise caution in your daily affairs, especially with those persons 
  closest to you.

That lemon on the left, for instance.

Be assured that a walk through the ocean of most souls would scarcely get
  get your feet wet.  

Fall not in lover therefore; it will stick to your face.

Gracefully surrender the things of youth, birds, clean air, tuna, Taiwan;
  let not the sands of time get in your lunch.

Hire people with hooks.

For a good time, call 606-4311; ask for Ken.

Take heart amid the deepening gloom that your dog is finally getting enough
  cheese; and reflect that whatever misfortune may be your lot, it could
  only be worse in Milwaukee.  

You are a fluke of the universe; you have no right to be here, and whether
  you can hear it or not, the universe is laughing behind your back.

Therefore make peace with your God whatever you conceive Him to be;
  Hairy Thunderer or Cosmic Muffin.

With all its hopes, dreams, promises, & urban renewal, the world continues
  to deteriorate.

Give up.

			By Tony Hendra (National Lampoon 1972)