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From: snappy@ihlpa.UUCP (m. schulpiet)
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: Growing Old - Ed Crandall, Ed. Daily News,
Message-ID: <856@ihlpa.UUCP>
Date: Tue, 5-Nov-85 12:38:29 EST
Article-I.D.: ihlpa.856
Posted: Tue Nov  5 12:38:29 1985
Date-Received: Wed, 6-Nov-85 00:26:30 EST
Distribution: na
Organization: AT&T Bell Laboratories
Lines: 50

Growing Old....

Your getting old when....
   You get up in the morning and everything hurst.  What
doesn't hurt doesn't work.

   You get a sudden gleam in your eye.  It's the sun 
reflecting off your bifocals.

   You tell your coworkers you feel so tough from the
night before.  But you weren't anywhere the night before.

   You see all those middle-aged people around
your house.  They're your children.

   You finally take the plunge and join a health and exercise
club.  Then you don't go.

   At last, you know all the answers.  Nobody asks you the
questions.

   You settle dow in your favorite rocking chair.  You can't
get it going.

   Your knees buckle, but your belt doesn't.

   You remember today that yesterday was your wedding
anniversary.

   Your back goes out more than you do.

   You stop looking forward to your next birthday.

   You get tired dialing long distance.

   You're burning the midnight oil, but it's only
9 pm.

   A fortune teller offers to read the wrinkles on
your face.

   You take your wife out to a romantic cancle-light dinner at
at plush supper club, sink your teeth into a choice steak and they
stay there.

|: ))

Marge

.