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From: phanes@sun.uucp (Pam Hanes)
Newsgroups: net.kids
Subject: Head-Banging
Message-ID: <2948@sun.uucp>
Date: Tue, 29-Oct-85 20:33:09 EST
Article-I.D.: sun.2948
Posted: Tue Oct 29 20:33:09 1985
Date-Received: Sat, 2-Nov-85 03:39:35 EST
Distribution: net
Organization: Sun Microsystems, Inc.
Lines: 31


This message is in response to a previous letter that was sent in by a
parent whose child was banging his/her head against hard objects.  Since I 
have no children of my own, I deleated the message and kept my comments to 
myself.  After many days of deliberation, I have decided to post this in hopes 
that the person involved will take it into consideration anyway.

My husband, as a child, also displayed this type of behavior; banging his head
against walls, wood floors, chairs, ect. (he now sports a nice dent in his 
upper forehead from it).  His mother told me that he generally did this when 
he was upset, usually mad, at something (read-someone).  She felt that he did 
this because he knew that it was wrong to hit Mommy, sisters, ect. when he was 
upset so he did something that he knew would catch their attention and hurt 
them without actually touching them (pretty deep psychology here I know, but 
she does have five kids).

Try as she might, nothing seemed to prevent him from doing this.  She started 
placing a pillow between his head and whatever he was banging against to 
prevent any injury, and around age 2 he stopped this behavior all together.
I know that this is not much of a solution, but she seemed to think that by
putting the pillow down and walking away, he was not getting the negative at-
tention he was receiving before, and found other ways of dealing with his
emotions.

I hope this information is of some use or comfort to you and I wish you the
best in dealing with this problem.


					-Pamela Hanes

"...and some people kiss cows..."