Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.2 9/18/84; site watdaisy.UUCP Path: utzoo!watmath!watnot!watdaisy!mvramakrishn From: mvramakrishn@watdaisy.UUCP (Rama) Newsgroups: net.nlang.india Subject: Re: Marriages and Dowry Expires: Refere Message-ID: <7436@watdaisy.UUCP> Date: Fri, 4-Oct-85 17:28:24 EDT Article-I.D.: watdaisy.7436 Posted: Fri Oct 4 17:28:24 1985 Date-Received: Sat, 5-Oct-85 03:19:36 EDT References: <5585@fortune.UUCP> <51700004@uiucdcsp> <3039@ut-sally.UUCP> Reply-To: mvramakrishn@watdaisy.UUCP (Rama) Organization: U of Waterloo, Ontario Lines: 65 Keywords: Dowry, Root cause, Arranged marriages, Educated. Summary: Root cause of DOWRY IS ARRANGED MARRIAGES. I don't think any body has addressed the root cause of the dowry system. I feel arranged marriages lead to dowry in PRACTICE; I am not saying arranged marriage SHOULD lead to dowry. The last posting about this topic blamed the taker of dowry; the one before blamed the giver. Both points have their merits depending on various factors. To the best of my knowledge (From the marriages of my friends and relatives) education does play a role in dowry: THE EDUCATED BOY IS MORE COSTLY. It is also true that a RICH boy is more costly than a poorer one. One also finds that a "beautiful" girl (I mean her parents) can buy a "better" boy for a given amount of money than a .... If you take a sunday paper in India and browse through the matrimonial column you see that the distribution of the requirements of the boy is some kind of exponential function. Every girls parents want the boy to be "Doctor/Engineer/Bank Officer" (well not really some will settle for IAS/IFS officer). This is a simple problem of supply and demand. What percent of boys are "Doctors/..." ? Who will marry a clerk/truck driver/taxi driver/waiter etc? Once a boy has narrowed down the list of girls he likes to marry obviously he chooses to marry the one who can pay the most. Another factor which affects the boys decision is the LAW OF CONSERVATION OF DOWRY. THE LAW: If the number of brothers and sisters in a family is equal, then there is no gain or loss of money because of DOWRY. If a brother decides to be a hero among his friends and refuses to accept dowry, then where does he find a groom for her sister who does not want dowry? The whole system has degenerated starting from the gifts given by girls parents(that is what I believe; Request to be corrected on history). It could very well have been degenerated the other way. i.e., the boy has to pay to the girls parents to marry her! (There are some tribes in which this is the case) Probably then a beautiful/educated/singer/dancer/... etc would have been more costly to buy. An Engineer/.../rich boy could buy a "better" girl than a clerk/.../. clerk for the same money. (Two of my sisters were married in the last one year. One got married to a rich engineer; nominal amount of dowry another was married to a bank teller/clerk; standard amount of dowry. Needless to say the first one was much better looking than the second. Both were graduates.) I don't think dowry can be eradicated until the decision as to who marries whom is based on insufficient data as in the CURRENT arranged marriages. Love marriages is *A* solution. ------------------------------------------------------- I intended to enclose within quotes all words such as buy, sell, market beautiful, better, good, bad,supply, demand etc. Please read them so. UUCP: {decvax,utzoo,ihnp4,allegra,clyde}!watmath!watdaisy!mvramakrishn CSNET: mvramakrishn%watdaisy@waterloo.csnet ARPA: mvramakrishn%watdaisy%waterloo@csnet-relay.arpa Mail: M.V.Ramakrishna, Dept of Computer Science, University of Waterloo, Waterloo Ont., N2L 3G1 Canada