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From: st175@sdcc13.UUCP (st175)
Newsgroups: net.bizarre
Subject: Urinals...a study in trajectory
Message-ID: <313@sdcc13.UUCP>
Date: Tue, 17-Sep-85 14:04:36 EDT
Article-I.D.: sdcc13.313
Posted: Tue Sep 17 14:04:36 1985
Date-Received: Thu, 26-Sep-85 07:02:32 EDT
Organization: U.C. San Diego, Academic Computer Center
Lines: 40
Keywords: arc,splatter,puddles


     Doggone it, I'm sick of those lousy urinals we (guys) put up
with!!!!
     I know this is sort of flameish, and sort of net.general
because of all the usefull info you'll gleam from it, but bizarre
seems to be the place for the truly fresh ideas (except for the
stupid (re:official animal or re:bizarre signs,names,etc)^99
articles).

     O.K., here's the scoop.  You're programming like a mad dog, and
drinking coffee at a rate that gives Juan Valdez a hernia from
picking all those beans when suddenly.......I GOTTA GO!!!! (at this
point you: squirm,jive,run in place,turn yellow) and head to the
bathroom.  

                     * T h e  P r o b l e m *
Those stupid Crown Royal urinals (especially the long, tall ones)
seem to have been designed with one purpose in mind.....splattering
the maximum amount of caffinated urine on the maximum surface area
of the urinator........
They think they're so smart, don't they.................WEll
A-HaHAHAHAHAHA I figured 'em out.

                       * S o l u t i o n *
It's all in the wrist.
What you need to do is stand about 3-4' back and use about a 68-73.5
degree arc.  Hit the back of the urinal (about 2/3rds of the way
down) and the leg wetting spray will be well reduced.
Another good reason for this solution is that if there are others
present, and your trajectory is bad, the other people are so busy
looking in their own urinals (why, I dunno....moron peep show?) that
as you spray them they will probably just attribute the present
drenched condition as being caused by the old-self-applied-leg
wetter that they've corraled themselves to.

                Work on it, and we'll see you at the John,
 

                      
      A nice dry programmer who really needs to go...bad...honest..