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From: jeff@rtech.UUCP (Jeff Lichtman)
Newsgroups: net.women
Subject: Re: Regret
Message-ID: <656@rtech.UUCP>
Date: Wed, 25-Sep-85 03:20:47 EDT
Article-I.D.: rtech.656
Posted: Wed Sep 25 03:20:47 1985
Date-Received: Fri, 27-Sep-85 07:17:07 EDT
References: <30531@lanl.ARPA>, <235@tekig5.UUCP> <1193@mtgzz.UUCP>
Organization: Relational Technology, Alameda CA
Lines: 36

> 
> >	"Hell yes, I'd change a lot of things, and I think 
> >those people who say 'I'd do it the same way' are a 
> >bunch of lying assholes."
> 
> 	I think there is a big difference between regreting something
> you and saying you wouldn't want to change anything.  If I had my
> life to live over again, I would do things differently in some instances...
> 	I don't see any reason to regret anything I've done. If you go
> through life with 20/20 hindsight, you're cheating yourself. You can't
> live your life now if you're busy rehashing the past.
> 	Is this lack of regret particular to women? I saw the original
> article and the question seemed to be "Is this true for more women than
> just the ones I know?" Well, this woman can honestly say that she doesn't
> regret anything she's done.
> 
> Sharon Badian

My feelings about regret are pretty much the same as Sharon's.  It doesn't
make much sense to worry about what you have done before; it happened, and
there's nothing you can do about it.  Also, I feel that the bad things that
have happened to me helped me become what I am as much as the good things;
to wish that they had never happened is like saying that I would trade away
a part of my personality for a memory of an easier life.  I've always felt
that a person's personality is sacred, and that no one has the right to
mess with mine, not even myself (a strange concept, but so is the idea that
one could change the past; if my grandmother has wheels, she'd be a buggy).

The only time I ever feel regret is when I think about times that I hurt
someone.  These are the only things that make me wish I could change the past.
-- 
Jeff Lichtman at rtech (Relational Technology, Inc.)
"Saints should always be judged guilty until they are proved innocent..."

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