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From: chu@lasspvax.UUCP (Clare Chu)
Newsgroups: net.singles
Subject: SO's in the medical profession
Message-ID: <469@lasspvax.UUCP>
Date: Mon, 19-Aug-85 21:16:07 EDT
Article-I.D.: lasspvax.469
Posted: Mon Aug 19 21:16:07 1985
Date-Received: Sat, 24-Aug-85 01:00:40 EDT
Reply-To: chu@lasspvax.UUCP (Clare Chu)
Organization: LASSP, Cornell University
Lines: 37
Keywords: aargh!
Summary: 

References:


  Perhaps this can be a starting point for new discussions?
I don't know how many of you are in this situation, but it
can get quite aggravating.  My fiance is a third year medical
student.  Through the last three years I have been very
patient and understanding, doing all the traveling to go see
him and not bothering him when he has tests or is on call.

  In June he took the National Boards Part I.  As it turns out
he flunked it.  About a month ago, he called me and desperately
wanted me to go comfort him.  Now he's studying for them again
and still wants me to see him.  However he says that if he
flunks it again, he'll disappear from society--leave his
parents and friends ( me included)...   Now what am I supposed
to do?  There really is nothing that I can do except accept
it.  However he'll most likely pass them and in that case
he wants me to think about marrying him.  Is this a bit bizarre?
He says the other medical students are just as hyper has he is.
One girl fainted at the test, a friend passed out when he got his
scores...  Anyway I'm sort of in limbo, aren't I?  What should
I do?  Maybe if I'm really self-actualized I'd just not worry
about it.  But it seems a catch-22.  If I drop him now, he'll
get depressed and then blame me if he flunks again.  If he passes,
he'll say that I didn't have faith in him.  I would just rather
stick with him, and that would be allright if he passes, but if
he doesn't...I'll feel even more hurt because I would be the
one who was dropped.  The thing that makes this so tough is that
we get along great and really care for each other and that his
leaving has nothing to do with me...(boo hoo hoo)  :-( 

this is not a joke...it's for real

any suggestions will be appreciated
                                    -Clare

p.s. I really liked San Diego when I was there...so why did I end up
     with a Puerto Rican from the Bronx?