Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.1 6/24/83; site bigburd.UUCP Path: utzoo!linus!philabs!cmcl2!seismo!rochester!cmu-cs-pt!cadre!psuvax1!burdvax!bigburd!dowding From: dowding@bigburd.UUCP (John Dowding) Newsgroups: net.singles Subject: Re: The Value of Chutzpa Message-ID: <2042@bigburd.UUCP> Date: Tue, 20-Aug-85 11:26:03 EDT Article-I.D.: bigburd.2042 Posted: Tue Aug 20 11:26:03 1985 Date-Received: Fri, 23-Aug-85 20:54:30 EDT References: <317@azure.UUCP> <800@vax2.fluke.UUCP> Reply-To: dowding@bigburd.UUCP (John Dowding) Distribution: net Organization: sdc Lines: 42 In article <107@unc.unc.UUCP> fsks@unc.UUCP (Frank Silbermann) writes: >Chris Andersen: >>>> Frankly, if a women dismisses a guy JUST because he can't say "hello" >>>> without stuttering a little (a condition resulting from several years >>>> of being a "wimp"), then perhaps the women isn't even worth the try. > >Jane Caputo: >> I think it's a little strong to say she "isn't worth the try." >> But it's very realistic for someone like Chris, whose appeal is >> likely to be his sensitivity and warmth, to eliminate this woman. >> There's not likely to be much interest on either side. > >But this woman is NOT rejecting Chris' sensitivity and warmth. >She's rejecting his stuttering, his passivity and his inhibition. >This woman might well LOVE to meet a man with sensitivity and warmth, >provided it came wrapped differently. Does Chris consider his stuttering >to be an integral part of his personality? Did he choose to stutter >on philosophical or aesthetic grounds, or is it merely an accident >of his upbringing? > >Jane Caputo: >> If you want "somebody special", then the best thing you can do is learn >> to telegraph what you really are. Make sure your public image matches >> your private one as closely as possible, and give the right woman >> a chance to find you while you're looking for her. > >I agree. That's why Chris would do well to strengthen his public image. >Somehow I don't believe that stuttering awkwardness accurately reflects >Chris's true, inner self. Or does it? > > Frank Silbermann I cant speak for Chris, but I also stutter, and I would say that it is a very important part of who I am. It is as important to understanding me as any else. If you are interested in my "true, inner self", and you ignore the fact that I stutter, than you are missing something. It is impossible to tell from a distance which attributes of a person are superficial, and which are not. We certainly cant tell from a net discussion. John Dowding