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From: schuh@fluke.UUCP (Michael Schuh)
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: offensive to mathematicians (and engineers too, I suppose)
Message-ID: <1451@vax3.fluke.UUCP>
Date: Thu, 15-Aug-85 22:06:51 EDT
Article-I.D.: vax3.1451
Posted: Thu Aug 15 22:06:51 1985
Date-Received: Sat, 24-Aug-85 02:06:39 EDT
Distribution: net
Organization: John Fluke Mfg. Co., Inc., Everett, WA
Lines: 46
Keywords: mathematicians physicists engineers fires bed-wetting

*** REPLACE THIS LINE WITH YOUR MESSAGE ***
	No! I won't! You can't make me do it! ... No! Not that! Not the
	Canonical List of Light Bulb Jokes!  Arrrrgh!...

A few years ago I had the simply *delightful* experience of attending the
Colorado School of Mines, from which I eventually graduated.  As an entirely
engineering school, the students tended to look down on other scholastic
pursuits, the pure sciences (chemistry, physics) being considered as merely
amusing while other 'useless' and 'irrelevant' disciplines (math) were
joked about incessantly.  Liberal studies (speeling, wRitgn) were simply
ignored.  The engineers to-be, however, usually had a good sense of humor
about themselves: I learned this joke while at Mines...

 - * -  - * -  - * -  - * -  - * -  - * -  - * -  - * -  - * -  - * -  - * -

It came to pass one night that there were in a hotel a physicist, an engineer,
and a mathematician, each in a separate room.  Fortunately for this joke, a
small fire broke out in each room.

The physicist woke up, took note of the fire, and quickly made some
observations and measurements.  Using the back the hotel's wine list, the
physicist made a few quick calculations and then, grabbing a fire
extinguisher, aimed one short burst at the flames, putting the fire out.
The physicist then crawled back into the dry bed and went to sleep.

The engineer woke up, took note of the fire, and quickly made some observations
and measurements.  Using the back a rather seamy magazine, the engineer made a
few quick calculations and then, grabbing a fire extinguisher, throughly
hosed down the room, putting the fire out.  The engineer then crawled
back into the wet bed and went to sleep, dreaming about the seamy magazine.

The mathematician woke up, took note of the fire, and quickly made some
observations and measurements.  Using some chalk and the wall of the room,
the mathematician made a few quick calculations.  Exclaiming "A solution
exists!", the mathematician then crawled back into the dry bed and
went to sleep.

 - * -  - * -

I suppose there is a moral here somewhere, but I wouldn't know - I don't have
any morals!

Mike Schuh/ms274G/John Fluke Mfg Co/Box C9090/Everett WA 98206 USA/206-356-6241
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