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From: throopw@rtp47.UUCP (Wayne Throop)
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: YAEMP
Message-ID: <154@rtp47.UUCP>
Date: Wed, 21-Aug-85 12:27:54 EDT
Article-I.D.: rtp47.154
Posted: Wed Aug 21 12:27:54 1985
Date-Received: Sat, 24-Aug-85 15:09:06 EDT
References: <1451@vax3.fluke.UUCP>
Organization: Data General, RTP, NC
Lines: 63

> It came to pass one night that there were in a hotel a physicist, an
> engineer, and a mathematician, each in a separate room.  Fortunately for
> this joke, a small fire broke out in each room.

AHA! Engineer, Mathematician and Physicist jokes! (I heard this one a
tad differently, but I won't quibble.... Well, OK I will.  The order
should be engineer, physicist, mathematician, since they are then
ordered in decreasing severity of reaction to the blaze.)

In any event, I happen to have a modest stock of EMP jokes here...

--
An engineer, a mathematician, and a physicist were abducted by Space
Aliens for phychological experimentation.  The three are placed in a
long corridor with a spectacularly endowed nude person of the female
persuasion at the far end.  The three are told that they can advance
half the remaining distance to the other end of the corridor at the
sound of a gong, which would sound every five seconds.  If anyone moves
before the gong, the offender would be disintegrated.

The mathematician and the physicist discuss the situation, while the
engineer rushes for each half-way point in time with the gongs.  The
mathematician and the physicist agree that (regretably) it is impossible
to ever reach the young lady, and say as much to the engineer, now on
the third stop.  The engineer replies

"Well, yes... but eventually I'll be CLOSE ENOUGH!"
--
A simple intelligence test was given to applicants for a certain job.
It so happened that an engineer, a mathematician and a physicist
applied.  The test had two parts.  The applicant was first placed in a
room with a hotplate, a sink, and an empty kettle, and asked to make hot
water.  Then the applicant was placed in a room with a hotplate, a sink,
and a kettle full of cold water, and again asked to make hot water.

The engineer and the physicist both performed in an exemplary fashion.
In the first case, they filled the kettle, and heated the water.  In the
second case they simply boiled the water.

The mathematician, on the other hand, thought carefully in the first
case, and eventually filled the kettle and heated the water.  In the
second case, after even more thought, he emptied the kettle, reducing
the problem to one he had already solved....
--
An engineer, a mathematician and a physicist were each asked if all odd
numbers are prime.  The mathematician replied, "Well, nine is odd, yet
not prime, so not all odd numbers are prime."

The physicist said "Well, three's prime, five's prime, and seven's
prime... I think that's enough data... they must all be prime!"

The engineer said "Well, three's prime, five's prime, seven's prime,
nine's prime, eleven's prime, thirteen's prime...."
--

I regret to admit that these four jokes (Fire, Space Aliens, IQ test,
and Odd Primes) are all the EMP jokes I can remember.  Ideally, more are
needed that make the E or P the object of the joke, since two of the
four feature the M in this roll.  Ah well, I suppose there will now be a
flood of YAEMP postings, and I can select a more balanced set to
memorize and use to bore the unwary at parties...
-- 
Wayne Throop at Data General, RTP, NC
!mcnc!rti-sel!rtp47!throopw