Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP
Posting-Version: Notesfiles $Revision: 1.7.0.8 $; site fthood
Path: utzoo!linus!philabs!cmcl2!seismo!harvard!talcott!panda!genrad!decvax!harpo!whuxlm!whuxl!houxm!ihnp4!inuxc!pur-ee!uiucdcs!uiucuxc!fthood!jrife
From: jrife@fthood
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: OSHA,EPA,the oil co, and the moose
Message-ID: <600003@fthood>
Date: Thu, 8-Aug-85 13:17:00 EDT
Article-I.D.: fthood.600003
Posted: Thu Aug  8 13:17:00 1985
Date-Received: Thu, 15-Aug-85 21:55:12 EDT
Lines: 41
Nf-ID: #N:fthood:600003:000:2573
Nf-From: fthood!jrife    Aug  8 12:17:00 1985


	Has anyone heard about the clash a while back between the EPA, OSHA, and
the oil companies?
	It seems that the country needed more oil, so that the oil companies got
together to build this pipeline to bring oil down from the North Slope of
Alaska.  During the building of the line, the Environmental Protection Agency
watched very closely what the oil companies were doing, since most of Alaska
was part of some nationall protected land.
	One of the stipulations that the EPA made was that the pipeline could
not in any way interfere with the wildlife.  In this vein, the moose caused a
great many problems for the oil companies.  Since the moose are migratory
animals, and the pipeline lay between where they were, and where they were
going, the EPA told the oil companies that they had to make provisions for the
moose getting past the pipeline.
	They raised the pipeline in some locations so that the migrating moose
could pass under it.  The oil companies were happy, the EPA was happy, and the
moose were happy.
	But the oil flowing through the pipeline was warmer than the surrounding
ground, and the support structures for the pipeline heated up the ground and
melted the (formerally) perma-frost.  This caused the pipeline to settle.
	The oil companies did not mind, as the line had been designed to take
some stress, and the breaks that occured were minor.  But the EPA was angry,
because now the moose could not get through under the elevated pipeline, so
their migratory pattern was disrupted, which was a no-no.
	The oil companies solved this problem by throwing dirt against the
pipeline, and building up a ramp over the pipeline.  This was again OK'd by the
EPA, who also appreciated the fact that the ramps were landscaped naturally.
	But now OSHA, the Occupational Safety and Health Administration, was
upset.  It seems they have a rule about elevated structures around oil producing
facilities, and that such structures have to have handrails.  The oil companies
thought it was silly, but they agreed to build handrails for the moose.
	This upset the EPA, who thought the moose would not use the ramp with
the handrails present.  Eventually, the EPA agreed, and the oil companies built
handrails for the moose.  Which left them with another problem...
	OSHA says that all handrails must be painted in a color scheme that
depends on the use of the handrail. (i.e. Handrails on stairs are red, those on
the edge of drilling platforms are black and yellow, etc.)

	So, WHAT COLOR DO YOU PAINT HANDRAILS FOR MIGRATORY MOOSE??

					ihnp4!uiucuxc!fthood!jrife