Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP
Posting-Version: version B 2.10.1 6/24/83; site proper.UUCP
Path: utzoo!linus!philabs!cmcl2!seismo!lll-crg!dual!proper!carl
From: carl@proper.UUCP (Carl Greenberg)
Newsgroups: net.bizarre
Subject: Apply for membership now!
Message-ID: <191@proper.UUCP>
Date: Wed, 7-Aug-85 17:53:41 EDT
Article-I.D.: proper.191
Posted: Wed Aug  7 17:53:41 1985
Date-Received: Sun, 11-Aug-85 05:06:23 EDT
Reply-To: carl@proper.UUCP (Carl Greenberg)
Organization: Lunatic Laboratories Unltd.
Lines: 59
Keywords: insanity chaos anarchy discord fun sex drugs rock'n'roll
Disorganization:  Discordian Society


 ___________________________________________________________________________
|                        Application for Membership			    |
|           In the Erisian Movement of the DISCORDIAN SOCIETY               |
|									    |
|	1.  Today's date		Yesterday's date		    |
|									    |
|	2.  Purpose of this application:  --membership in: a. Legion of     |
|	    Dynamic Discord   b. POEE  c. Bavarian Illuminati  d. All of    |
|	    the above  e. None of the above  f. Other--be SPECIFIC!         |
|									    |
|       3.  Name			Holy Name			    |
|       ________________________________________________________________    |
|									    |
|	    Address							    |
|       ________________________________________________________________    |
|    If temporary, also give an address from which mail can be forwarded.   |
|									    |
|	4.  Description:    Born:  [ ] yes [ ] no    Eyes:  [ ] 2 [ ] other |
|           Height:  _______ fl. oz.  Last time you had a haircut:          |
|	    Reason:          Race: [ ] horse [ ] human   I.Q.:  150-200     |
|	    200-250   250-300   over 300				    |
|									    |
|	5.  History:   Education - highest grade completed 1 2 3 4 5 6 >6   |
|	    Professional:  On another ream of paper list every job since    |
|	    1937 from which you have been fired.   Medical:  On a seperate  |
|	    sheet labeled "confidential," list all major psychotic episodes |
|	    experienced within the last 24 hours			    |
|									    |
|	6.  Sneaky questions to establish personality traits		    |
|	    I would rather a. live in an outhouse  b. play in a rock group  |
|	    c. eat caterpillars.   I wear obscene tattoos because _________ |
|	    _____________________     I have ceased raping little children  |
|	    [ ] yes  [ ] no --  reason ________________________             |
|									    |
|	7.  SELF-PORTRAIT						    |
|									    |
|									    |
|						 ________________________   |
|						|			 |  |
|						|      LICK  HERE!       |  |
|						|	   @@        	 |  |
|						|	   @@		 |  |
|						| (You may be one of the |  |
|						|       lucky 25)	 |  |
|   Rev. Greenberg				|________________________|  |
|   For Office Use Only-  acc. rej. burned				    |
|___________________________________________________________________________|

INSTRUCTIONS:
1.	Fill out this application in five copies.
2.	Sign and nose-print each copy.
3.	Send one to carl@proper.UUCP (Improper UNIX).
4.	Send one to your System Administrator.
5.	Nail one to a telephone pole.  Hide one.  And burn the other.
Then consult your pineal gland.

DISCORDIAN UNIX:  TECHNOLOGICAL WEIRDNESS --       Lunatic Laboratories Unltd.
						   Mass Insanity Research Etc.