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From: aeq@pucc-h (Jeff Sargent)
Newsgroups: net.singles
Subject: Re: seminar on "Preparing for Marriage": Expectations
Message-ID: <2181@pucc-h>
Date: Tue, 6-Aug-85 10:26:01 EDT
Article-I.D.: pucc-h.2181
Posted: Tue Aug  6 10:26:01 1985
Date-Received: Sun, 11-Aug-85 07:21:14 EDT
References: <2176@pucc-h>
Organization: Purdue University Computing Center
Lines: 53

EXPECTATIONS ARE THE SINGLE GREATEST ASSET OR LIABILITY ANY OF US BRING TO
MARRIAGE.

ACTIVITY TWO:  YOUR EXPECTATIONS OF A PERSON

On a 3x5 card describe the type person you expect in order to fulfill the
vision of marriage you have.  Be specific enough to list at least three
qualities you would look for.  (If married or engaged, remember back to
what your expectations were beforehand.)

ACTIVITY THREE:  WHERE DO YOUR EXPECTATIONS COME FROM?

A. Cultural conditioning plays an important part.

B. Our own parents are a conditioning factor in our marriage expectations.

C. Other married couples we encountered in our childhood are factors.

D. For Christians, the Church can be a shaping factor of expectation.

Spend a few minutes reflecting on the three questions below.  Then share
with your group of three people.  Take about three minutes per person for
your answers.

1. As you look back to the three traits you wrote on the card, where did they
   originate?  Fairy tales?  T.V.?  Movies?  Parents?  Church?  Other?

2. How did your parents shape your expectations for marriage?  Was it a
   relationship you want to copy or has it made you afraid of marriage?
   Was it fun or boring?  Calm or stormy?  Constructive or destructive?

3. Can you think of a couple(s) who seemed to model an acceptable marriage
   for you?  What was their main strength?  What style of life/marriage
   did they have?

WRAP-UP STATEMENTS

"Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of
your mind, that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good
and acceptable and perfect."  (Romans 12:2)

"We cannot get to the Promised Land without going through some desert
on the way."

"Most friendships and marriages go through a continuing cycle of major and
minor phases of the classic three stages of love:  DREAM, DISAPPOINTMENT,
DISCOVERY."

-- 
-- Jeff Sargent
{decvax|harpo|ihnp4|inuxc|ucbvax}!pur-ee!pucc-h!aeq
The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.  (James 5:16)
The prayer of a not-so-righteous man availeth sometimes....  (Rich McDaniel)