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From: frye@cuuxa.UUCP (frye)
Newsgroups: net.singles
Subject: Recent topics (i.e. XSO's & friendship, "married up", etc.)
Message-ID: <225@cuuxa.UUCP>
Date: Tue, 9-Jul-85 17:37:56 EDT
Article-I.D.: cuuxa.225
Posted: Tue Jul  9 17:37:56 1985
Date-Received: Thu, 11-Jul-85 07:18:04 EDT
Distribution: net
Organization: AT&T Technologies CSD, Lisle, Il.
Lines: 87

I have been following some of the topics in this group for a 
while. Now its time for me to open my big mouth. On the topic
of SO's... My definition of an SO is: She's the lady  with
whom I have gotten close enough to consider sharing the rest
of my life with her. As to whether I would want to continue
being friends with an ex-SO, I'd have to say no. I don't want
to keep up a relationship for a number of seasons but, the
most important one would have to be something like this: if
we break up for what ever reason, we'll probably both heal up
enough to eventually find someone new to go out with. If we
see each other we are likely to "crowd" each others new SO's
and make them uncomfortable. The whole idea for dating is
to find someone compatible, not to find someone to make un-
comfortable. Now, on the other hand, chance encounters may
happen and they should be handled tactfully but, that's a
little hard to do if your still hurting from the breakup. It
does hurt if you really loved the SO you just lost. I don't
like constant reminders of a relationship I lost out on 'til
I've had time to "heal up" a little. And, if I find a new
SO, I don't want to have to explain that the women was my
former SO. We broke up because of blah-blah-blah. It's not
her problem and she probably doesn't want to hear it anyway.


 


Ah, what's all this om, feces I hear about endangered available
men?

I have also been following the topic of "Whose more marriageable"
and I am not pleased. Tell all them damned fickle females to stay
away from Doctors. I guess I have to take it that an "ol' cowboy"
like me isn't good enough (according to some female critters). I
fail to see where my doctor friend is any better than I am and so
does he. You ladies want to do something smart in the way of get-
ting married, go find yourself a guy who works 40 hours a week and
can come home evenings. A doctor gets called out a lot if he's any
good at all. And if he's so damned intelligent, he will get bored
with you if you're not. Stay the hell away from the "Shrink types"
too. Them people don't have any more sence than to get involved in
everyone else's problems. They often carry those problems around
with them and even bring them home. My opinion on attorneys isn't
very high either. Those people are in it for the money and not for
justice. Seems that the quicker they get someone off for some crime
the quicker he can get into trouble again and fork out some more
money to another attorney. (And you folks wondered why the crime
rate is so high.) There isn't any money in lowering the crime rate.
Go tell yer mother to marry one of the above. I think she deserves
the favor if she's been putting that "marry a doctor" shit in your
head. And, fer Christ's Sake, marry someone you love, like, and
respect instead of marrying his job! The best kind of person to
marry is the type who'll let you do as you damned please. If they'll
trust you that far (to do what you think is right) you can probably
trust that person equally as far.

Enough of my sermons. I don't mean for the above to be taken as
the ravings of some rabid lunatic. I've just seen too many people
marry some "status symbol" and end up miserable. I've also found
a couple of women in my bed because the bed they belong in is just
too damned cold and lonely. That pisses me off a whole bunch now
that I have time to think back on it.





Note: These views are mine and mine alone. The company I work
for has probably got better sence that to stick their (col-
lective) noses into this type of discussion.






There are probably two major causes of divorce today. 1) Marriage
2) Mother's (bad) advice.



Regards,
T. R. Frye


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