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From: kaufman@uiucdcs.Uiuc.ARPA
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: Puns for the Day
Message-ID: <9900368@uiucdcs>
Date: Thu, 11-Jul-85 14:29:00 EDT
Article-I.D.: uiucdcs.9900368
Posted: Thu Jul 11 14:29:00 1985
Date-Received: Sat, 13-Jul-85 08:37:20 EDT
Lines: 26
Nf-ID: #N:uiucdcs:9900368:000:1419
Nf-From: uiucdcs.Uiuc.ARPA!kaufman    Jul 11 13:29:00 1985


I heard that there's going to be a tv documentary on the financial problems
Arnold Schwarzeneger has had since he made his last movie.  Things have gotten
so bad for him, he's had to get a job with a pest control company.  The name
of this documentary:  The Ex-Terminator.

A lot of consumer products have been in the news lately.  Attempting to
capitalize on the recent hijacking/hostage drama, Hi C has come out with a new
drink flavor called Navvi Berry.  Meanwhile, you can now buy a roll of six
tablets; five are simple indigestion tablets, while one is a cyanide pill.
It's being marketed under the name of Russian Rolaids.  Of course, the big
story in the consumer products department has to deal with Coca-Cola's decision
to start selling the old product again.  Who could blame them, what with all
complaints from all the Old Coke drinkers?  They finally had enough of their
hot line being overloaded and, in effect, said, "Don't call us; we'll cola
you."

And how about those girlie magazines getting and publishing nude photos of
Madonna!  Of course those pictures were taken when she was much younger,
certainly before she became a big star or even started to develop her
now-famous image.  You might say those shots came from when she was still a
pre-Madonna.

Ken Kaufman (uiucdcs!kaufman)
"I'd rather clean all the bathrooms in Grand Central Station with my tongue
 than spend one more minute with you."