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From: itkin@luke.UUCP (Steven List)
Newsgroups: net.kids
Subject: Re: nudity and kids
Message-ID: <272@luke.UUCP>
Date: Mon, 8-Jul-85 23:24:23 EDT
Article-I.D.: luke.272
Posted: Mon Jul  8 23:24:23 1985
Date-Received: Sat, 13-Jul-85 12:19:08 EDT
References: <219@cuuxa.UUCP>
Reply-To: itkin@luke.UUCP (Steven List)
Distribution: net
Organization: Benetics Corp, Mt.View, CA
Lines: 40
Summary: 

In article <219@cuuxa.UUCP> frye@cuuxa.UUCP (frye) writes:
>This is in responce to Charlie Perkins' posting...
>My personal belief is this: Don't let a child see
>anything he/she will have questions about regarding sex 'til
>such a time as the child can ask those questions an under-
>stand the answers.
>
>I don't believe in creating questions in a child intention-
>ally unless they can ask them and get an answer.

I have some trouble with this attitude.  Since I've already posted my
feelings on the subject of nudity and children, I won't rehash the whole
thing except to say that there are no rules against it in our house.

The article written by frye implies that being naked in front of a child
would create a question.  Why?  Nudity is natural.  A child sees
him/herself and his/her siblings nude.  Also friends.  Usually, if the
child and parent are involved in any kind of sports activities (like
swimming) the child will have been exposed to other adults and children
in a locker room or such.  Why go to the trouble of hiding it?

The painful implication that nudity goes hand-in-hand with sex is the
problem, and that is in the mind of the adults, not the children.  When
a child asks "What is that?", I answer.  If it's my penis, that's what I
say.  The same goes for any other organ.  They have them, so why
shouldn't we?  I fear that the attitude that frye (and others) have
expressed is the cause of too much repression and confusion.  That
attitude causes the child to wonder "What are they hiding?  It must be
pretty important for them to work so hard at it!  I better find out and
then keep it a secret that I know what it is.".  THAT scares me.

I'm sure that children develop in a healthy fashion from both kinds of
homes.  I prefer, however, to avoid hiding things from my children
rather than create unhealthy questions.
-- 
***
*  Steven List @ Benetics Corporation, Mt. View, CA
*  Just part of the stock at "Uncle Bene's Farm"
*  {cdp,greipa,idi,oliveb,sun,tolerant}!bene!luke!steven
***