Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: Notesfiles $Revision: 1.7.0.5 $; site uiucdcs Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!cbosgd!ihnp4!inuxc!pur-ee!uiucdcs!seefromline From: kaufman@uiucdcs.Uiuc.ARPA Newsgroups: net.jokes Subject: Puns for the Day Message-ID: <9900368@uiucdcs> Date: Thu, 11-Jul-85 14:29:00 EDT Article-I.D.: uiucdcs.9900368 Posted: Thu Jul 11 14:29:00 1985 Date-Received: Sat, 13-Jul-85 08:37:20 EDT Lines: 26 Nf-ID: #N:uiucdcs:9900368:000:1419 Nf-From: uiucdcs.Uiuc.ARPA!kaufman Jul 11 13:29:00 1985 I heard that there's going to be a tv documentary on the financial problems Arnold Schwarzeneger has had since he made his last movie. Things have gotten so bad for him, he's had to get a job with a pest control company. The name of this documentary: The Ex-Terminator. A lot of consumer products have been in the news lately. Attempting to capitalize on the recent hijacking/hostage drama, Hi C has come out with a new drink flavor called Navvi Berry. Meanwhile, you can now buy a roll of six tablets; five are simple indigestion tablets, while one is a cyanide pill. It's being marketed under the name of Russian Rolaids. Of course, the big story in the consumer products department has to deal with Coca-Cola's decision to start selling the old product again. Who could blame them, what with all complaints from all the Old Coke drinkers? They finally had enough of their hot line being overloaded and, in effect, said, "Don't call us; we'll cola you." And how about those girlie magazines getting and publishing nude photos of Madonna! Of course those pictures were taken when she was much younger, certainly before she became a big star or even started to develop her now-famous image. You might say those shots came from when she was still a pre-Madonna. Ken Kaufman (uiucdcs!kaufman) "I'd rather clean all the bathrooms in Grand Central Station with my tongue than spend one more minute with you."