Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.2 9/18/84; site dcc1.UUCP Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!bonnie!akgua!gatech!dcc1!unixcorn From: unixcorn@dcc1.UUCP (math.c) Newsgroups: net.singles Subject: Re: "dead fish" handshakes given by males to females Message-ID: <150@dcc1.UUCP> Date: Wed, 17-Jul-85 19:50:08 EDT Article-I.D.: dcc1.150 Posted: Wed Jul 17 19:50:08 1985 Date-Received: Fri, 19-Jul-85 00:58:28 EDT References: <234@cuuxa.UUCP> <850@ihlpg.UUCP> <698@lll-crg.ARPA> Reply-To: unixcorn@dcc1.UUCP (math.c) Distribution: net Organization: DeKalb Community College, Clarkston GA Lines: 38 Summary: In article <698@lll-crg.ARPA> bandy@lll-crg.UUCP (Andrew Scott Beals) writes: >In some random article or another, someone female says that she hates >"dead fish" handshakes given by males and goes on to say that they should >leave a "good indication of their presence" (paraphrased) and not treat her >like china. [what annoys me are men who shake my hand like a dead fish...] > >Of course, the degree of firmness that can be given without pain varies >widely from person to person (with a good metric being that women can >tolerate a good deal less squeeze (or perhaps the men are all being macho >and just aren't complaining)), and I don't really want to hurt anyone, but >being that I'm not Emily Post, I shall bow to her: > >[taken from chapter 3, "How do you do?"--Greetings] > >Personality of a handshake > What really irritates me is that (in a social situation at least) IT IS OFTEN FORGOTTEN THAT IT IS SUPPOSED TO BE THE WOMAN'S PEROGATIVE to initiate the hand shake when being introduced to a new male. If she doesn't put her hand out to be shaken, you (males) are not supposed to push yours out there ( or worse yet, grab hers) She is supposed to decide if that contact is desired and if not, it should not be 'pushed' on her. I assume in a business situation it is better to be ready to shake hands with 'anyone'. Then you hope for a decent firm (non-bone crushing) grip. PS I know a lot of older people (and others) with arthritis who would prefer gentle firmness to macho clamping any day. -- unixcorn (alias m. gould) "there's a unicorn in the garden and he's eating a lily" gatech!dcc1!unixcorn