Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.1 6/24/83; site utah-gr.UUCP Path: utzoo!linus!philabs!pwa-b!utah-gr!haas From: haas@utah-gr.UUCP (Walt Haas) Newsgroups: net.singles Subject: When does a friend become an SO? Message-ID: <1509@utah-gr.UUCP> Date: Thu, 11-Jul-85 15:58:38 EDT Article-I.D.: utah-gr.1509 Posted: Thu Jul 11 15:58:38 1985 Date-Received: Thu, 18-Jul-85 00:56:52 EDT Organization: Univ of Utah CS Dept Lines: 19 The discussion about when a friend turns into an SO assumes that there is a clear dividing line. I used to believe this myself, but in the last few years my real-world experience hasn't supported the idea of a clear line. For example, some women that I am close to could be described as very close friends, except that we also have sex occasionally. This could conceivably hurt a friendship in which one or both parties had a fair degree of sexual guilt, but in the cases I'm thinking of there is no such guilt and no such harm to the friendship has occurred. Are these women really significant to me? Most definitely! How can I tell? Well, one way is that the friendship really IS a friendship, ie. it doesn't depend on the sexual part of the relationship - if one of us isn't into sex for some reason or other the friendship doesn't deteriorate. These friendships depend more on such things as openness, mutual respect and shared values than on any expectation of sexual exclusiveness. Why is this worth mentioning? Because it happens in the real world, but nothing in any of my previous experience taught me to expect it. Cheers -- Walt Haas ...{decvax | ihnp4 | seismo}!utah-cs!haas