Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.2 9/18/84; site peora.UUCP Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!burl!ulysses!mhuxr!mhuxn!ihnp4!houxm!mtuxo!mtunh!mtung!mtunf!ariel!vax135!petsd!peora!jer From: jer@peora.UUCP (J. Eric Roskos) Newsgroups: net.singles Subject: Re: Re: Just how far can friendship go? - deviding line submitted Message-ID: <1272@peora.UUCP> Date: Fri, 12-Jul-85 10:53:05 EDT Article-I.D.: peora.1272 Posted: Fri Jul 12 10:53:05 1985 Date-Received: Sat, 13-Jul-85 13:59:05 EDT References: <317@azure.UUCP> <2910@cornell.UUCP> <226@uwvax.UUCP> <239@mcc-db.UUCP> Organization: Perkin-Elmer SDC, Orlando, Fl. Lines: 35 > YOU ARE SOs WHEN YOU BOTH FEEL LIKE YOU ARE SOs (i.e. have some definable > amount of committment to each other). Here we are with that funny word starting to appear again and again. I didn't grumble particularly when it was used by an engaged-person, since I figured he meant "marriage committment," but now it is starting to appear in vague contexts. Now "committment" means "feeling like you are an SO". Long ago in here I asked one of those dozens of questions I've asked that have found no answer (though this one is harder than "Bach's Eyesight," I'll admit), "What does this word `committment' mean to you?" I have always felt that "committment" is a word used to evade defining troubled aspects of a relationship in a clearer way (since I have seen it most often used to complain of deficiencies in a relationship: "We just don't seem to have a mutual committment," etc.). Sometimes it seems to mean "wish to remain together for life," sometimes it means "agreement not to date anybody else," and sometimes it just implies some sort of higher- than-average bonding. And sometimes it is just an euphemistic way of saying "Actually I don't think of you as my SO any more, there is someone else who fills that role." (Cf. Women-more-often-than-men discussion.) Rather than say again "what does this mean, anyway?" which would probably just produce a rather unintersting philosophical discussion, I will just utter a sort of metagrumble instead... I wish people wouldn't use the word "committment" unless they modify it with some adjective! It is like using the word "experience"... "John Doe doesn't have any experience." A vague word, and vaguely irritating. -- Shyy-Anzr: J. Eric Roskos UUCP: ..!{decvax,ucbvax,ihnp4}!vax135!petsd!peora!jer US Mail: MS 795; Perkin-Elmer SDC; 2486 Sand Lake Road, Orlando, FL 32809-7642 Gur ArgArjf... n qlvat pbzzhavpngvba sbez?