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From: cuccia@ucbvax.ARPA (Nick "Coosh" Cuccia)
Newsgroups: net.singles
Subject: Re: Good Friends
Message-ID: <8499@ucbvax.ARPA>
Date: Tue, 25-Jun-85 23:04:51 EDT
Article-I.D.: ucbvax.8499
Posted: Tue Jun 25 23:04:51 1985
Date-Received: Thu, 27-Jun-85 04:41:51 EDT
References: <2014@bigburd.UUCP>
Reply-To: cuccia@ucbvax.UUCP (Nick "Coosh" Cuccia)
Organization: Insanity Unlimited
Lines: 51

In article <2014@bigburd.UUCP> dowding@bigburd.UUCP (John Dowding) writes:
>
>I am curious about what people have to say about relationships that have
>developed with MOTOS that they had previously been good friends with.
>>From reading alot of net.singles, I have gotten the impression that it
>tends to happen more often with people who dont consider themselves very
>attractive (good-looking, strong, sociable, etc).  Do other people notice
>this?

Seems to be the way things have happened to me.  The four girlfriends
I've had in the past seven years thought of themselves as 'ugly duck-
lings' who would never turn into swans.  Looks don't attract me (well,
my head does turn for almost every Oriental woman that I walk by, but
that's just plain visual overload), How a person feels about themselves
and others does.  All four women were close friends, women whom I'd
known for at least a year.

>
>I can generalize over my somewhat limited experience to say that:
>
>1). These women had previously been my "beer-drinking buddies",
>2). I didnt have to be "the aggressor",
>3). I was always surprized at the time that a relationship was developing,
>4). and these women did not think that they were very attractive.
>

Agreed again.  There was no real aggressive behavior on either part.
Things just sort-of 'slid' into place..

>These relationships have always ended with one or the other of us going away
>(graduating, quiting, etc), never in anger, and some still remain very good
>friends.  The flip side of this is women friends that I have that I would
>have liked to have a deeper relationship with.  It can really kill a good
>friendship to have expectations along these lines.  Does anybody else have
>experiences like these?

Unfortunately for me, my scorecard isn't so great here.  We've never
parted in anger, only frustration.  Our friendships seemed to slide
away as easily as we slid together.  I'm still on friendly terms with
one of the women, but the fact that she had to return to Japan for
college had something to do with that (I'm going to visit her, when
the UC Glee Club goes to India, Hong Kong, and Japan this winter).
The rest are out there somewhere, I know not where.

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--Nick "Coosh" Cuccia
--{...}!ucbvax!cuccia  		(USENET)
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The University wouldn't dare say some of the things that I say...
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