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From: blanken@uiucdcs.Uiuc.ARPA
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: Offensive to Armless...
Message-ID: <9900369@uiucdcs>
Date: Fri, 12-Jul-85 21:02:00 EDT
Article-I.D.: uiucdcs.9900369
Posted: Fri Jul 12 21:02:00 1985
Date-Received: Sat, 13-Jul-85 15:16:46 EDT
Lines: 89
Nf-ID: #N:uiucdcs:9900369:000:2694
Nf-From: uiucdcs.Uiuc.ARPA!blanken    Jul 12 20:02:00 1985


###### from fritz at the the bike shop #######


A parish had an ad in the local newspaper for the job of bell ringer.
Included in the ad was the fact that the parish was an equal oppurtunity
employer. Well, on the day of the interview, only one person showed up
for the job. The parishoner noticed that the applicant didn't have any
arms, but still, he adhered to the truthfulness of the ad and started the
interview  in spite of the obvious handicap. 

 "Well, I guess the first question to ask" the parishoner said "is how do
you propose to ring the bell?"

 "Let's go up the belltower and I'll show you." replied the man.

So, up the tower they went and when they reached the top, the man said
"Here's how I'll ring it." and he backed up a few paces and ran headlong
into the bell, face first! Sure enough, the bell rang loud and clear. The
parishoner then said "You know, we ring that bell three times a day. One
of those three times is at noon. Do you think you can do that twelve times?"

"Sure." replied the man, and with that he backed up to show him again. 
Running headfirst, he slammed into the bell so hard that he rebounded off
of it and staggered all the way back to ledge and flipped right over the 
edge and fell to his death.

The parishoner ran down the tower and called the paramedics. After the 
ambulance arrived, one of the paramedics asked "Do you know this man's
name?" The parishoner said "Well, no, we never exchanged names during the
interview. Do you know him?"

And the paramedic said "Well, you know...his face rings a bell." 







(Wait!...there's more. )






















Well, the parishoner still didn't have a bellringer, so he ran the ad
for an additional week. To prove that irony exsists, the only applicant
to show up was another man with no arms. The parishoner was dumbfounded,
but he asked, holding his head in his hands, "How are you going to ring
the bell?"

The said "Let's go up the tower and I'll show you."

So up the tower they went and when they got there the man said "Here's how
I'll ring it." and with that he backed a couple of paces and ran headlong
into the bell, face first!! He hit it so hard that he rebounded back to the
ledge and flipped right over the edge and fell to his death. 

"Oh, Lord!" he said and ran down the tower to call the paramedics. When the
paramedics arrived, it was the same pair as before. The parishoner asked
immediately "Do you know this one also?"

And the paramedic said "Nope, but he's a dead ringer for the other guy."



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"No regrets, no regards"

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