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From: john@moncol.UUCP (John Ruschmeyer)
Newsgroups: net.singles
Subject: Re: Aggressiveness
Message-ID: <421@moncol.UUCP>
Date: Fri, 12-Jul-85 15:41:56 EDT
Article-I.D.: moncol.421
Posted: Fri Jul 12 15:41:56 1985
Date-Received: Sat, 13-Jul-85 14:38:17 EDT
References: <816@ihlpg.UUCP> <5557@cbscc.UUCP>
Organization: Monmouth College, West Long Branch, NJ 07764
Lines: 49

]From: jeand@ihlpg.UUCP (AMBAR)
]Message-ID: <816@ihlpg.UUCP>
]Organization: AT&T Bell Laboratories
]
]Perhaps this has been hashed to death before, but I'm going to ask anyway:
]What reactions do the netters here have to aggressiveness/lack of same in 
]women?
]
]Why am I asking?  Because I have a hunch that my SO's attitude is a bit of
]an anomaly.  What ratios of initiation are y'all out there comfortable with?
]50-50?  more?  less?

For me, it tends to depend on whether or not the agressiveness is coming as
part of a "relationship".

To explain:

I like a reasonable amount of agressiveness in someone I am dating- say a
50-50 ratio. It keeps me from having always to figure out what to do next
and how much is "permissible" in the relationship.

Outside of a relationship, I tend to get a little worried by too much
agressiveness. I am, unfortunately, not one of those that women want to
fall all over and drool about. :-) In short, women don't ask me out, I
usually have to ask them out.

The few women that do ask me out, then, often have the female version of my
own complaint. Unfortunately, the same thing that them the courage to ask
me out often makes them so agressive that I get "scared off".

============================================================================
Disclaimer: I am sure a few of you are readying rabid flames about how I
must seem to discriminate against less attractive women and how I should be
one to talk. Relax, this is not the case. I merely point out that the same
"desperation" that makes some men verrrrry annoying to women can also drive
certain women to be annoying to men.

If anybody cares, one of my biggest regrets in life was that I let myself
get "scared off" from one particular person in high school.

-- 
Name:		John Ruschmeyer
US Mail:	Monmouth College, W. Long Branch, NJ 07764
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