Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.2 9/17/84 chuqui version 1.7 9/23/84; site nsc.UUCP Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!burl!ulysses!allegra!mit-eddie!genrad!decvax!mcnc!akgua!gatech!nsc!steph From: steph@nsc.UUCP (Steph Rutel) Newsgroups: net.jokes,net.legal Subject: Re: Justice in Arkansas Message-ID: <2145@nsc.UUCP> Date: Fri, 4-Jan-85 12:40:51 EST Article-I.D.: nsc.2145 Posted: Fri Jan 4 12:40:51 1985 Date-Received: Mon, 7-Jan-85 03:18:50 EST References: <1852@ucf-cs.UUCP> Reply-To: steph@nsc.UUCP (Steph Rutel) Organization: National Semiconductor, Sunnyvale Lines: 54 Xref: watmath net.jokes:10183 net.legal:1215 Summary: .............I thought I would contribute some old, but "cute" and funny (at least I think so) yuks...... Q. How many Californians does it take to screw in a lightbulb ? A. Californians don't screw in light bulbs...they screw in hot tubs !! -------------------------------------------------------------------------- And then there was the story of Little Red Riding Hood on the way to visit her Grandmother. "Red" was a little concerned about walking through the woods all alone. After all, there were a lot of weirdos, especially wolves, out roamin' the woods these days. Being the smart young lady that she was, Red packed her Grandma's goodies...and then very carefully packed her .45 pistol into her basket. She put on her red cape, told her Mom goodby (who responded by telling her not to accept rides from strangers), picked up her basket and scooted off to her Grandma's house. Everything was going fine. However, her tra-la-la-ing was stopped short about three-fourths of the way through the forest when a big bad wolf jumped out from behind a tree !! Wolf: Now I've got you, Little Red Riding Hood !!! And I'm going to kill you right now, before you get to Grandma's house ! Where upon Red reached into her picnic basket, pulled out her .45, put it right up to the wolf's nose and said.... NO YOU'RE NOT !!! YOU'RE GOING TO EAT ME, JUST LIKE IT SAYS IN THE BOOK !! (I SUPPOSE YOU HAD TO BE THERE ....) -------------------------------------------------------------------------- And of course there is the true story (I actually listened to the incident while I was living in Portland, OR) of the lady newscaster assigned to do an update story on the Mount St. Helens eruptions. It seems that this lady (who shall remain nameless except to all those who actually saw the broadcast) was in a helicopter flying fairly close over the mountain when it spewed out a fairly large puff of steam. Now this gal, wanting to be the professional that she thought she was, immediately responded with : (Please note this is not verbatim, but it does contain the spirit) Mount St. Helens has just had an erection !!! -------- I wonder where her mind was ??? STEPH'R @ NSC