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From: tim@ccice5.UUCP (Timothy G. Becker)
Newsgroups: net.kids
Subject: Re: Spanking, good vs bad
Message-ID: <637@ccice5.UUCP>
Date: Wed, 16-Jan-85 17:07:05 EST
Article-I.D.: ccice5.637
Posted: Wed Jan 16 17:07:05 1985
Date-Received: Sun, 20-Jan-85 06:12:39 EST
References: <322@aesat.UUCP>
Reply-To: tim@ccice5.UUCP (Timothy G. Becker)
Organization: CCI Central Engineering, Rochester, NY
Lines: 37
Summary: 

In article <322@aesat.UUCP> rwh@aesat.UUCP (Russ Herman) writes:
	I too am somewhat surprised at the generally pro-spanking
	position of the net.  I can't speak for other people's kids,
	but my little guy has never been physically (I agree with
	whoever posted the comment about non-physical) spanked. Ever
	since he was about two, all I had to do is look at him in an
	angry tone and he'd cry.

Russ, why does he cry with a look?  What does THE LOOK communicate to your son?
Because a young child isn't real good at reasoning, disciplining must mean
something "unpleasant" (ie. spank, go to room, etc.)  When I give my
3 year old THE LOOK, he knows it means a spanking if he doesn't stop
the wrong behavior.  The look needs to be associated with some action in
the childs mind.  What thought of action invokes your child to cry when
he gets THE LOOK?

	I'm not sure whether he's more
	sensitive than some kids, or if it's *because* we've never
	spanked.

Why would it be *because* you've never spanked?

	That is saved for things like defiantly running out
	into traffic, sticking fingers in wall sockets, and reaching
	for things on the stove. While each of these has happenned once
	or twice, they have never been done defiantly, and training was
	successful without this last-resort measure.

I agree with your distinction for defiant behavior.

To all the nonspankers:  How do you ultimately get your child to
go to his room, sit on a chair, etc?  I'm asking honestly (no threats
intended).  My son gets right off the chair, opens the door to his
room, etc. when he's especially defiant.  What do you do then?  I spank.

Tim Becker.
...!{decvax,allegra,seismo}!rochester!ccice5!tim