Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.2 (Tek) 9/28/84 based on 9/17/84; site azure.UUCP Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!burl!ulysses!allegra!bellcore!decvax!tektronix!teklds!azure!annab From: annab@azure.UUCP (Anna Beaver) Newsgroups: net.singles Subject: Re: wearing rings (really men shopping for wives) Message-ID: <45@azure.UUCP> Date: Mon, 7-Jan-85 10:59:17 EST Article-I.D.: azure.45 Posted: Mon Jan 7 10:59:17 1985 Date-Received: Fri, 11-Jan-85 04:50:03 EST References: <954@utastro.UUCP> <861@watcgl.UUCP> <285@desint.UUCP> Organization: Tektronix, Beaverton OR Lines: 40 > > You have put your finger on a dilemma, Pooh, for those of us who *are* out > "shopping," for almost anything. For example, I figured out about 4 years ago > that I had made a major mistake by not having children. After thinking about > it, I decided that the thing I most wanted in life was the pitter-patter of > little feet about my house. So now I find myself in the position of "shopping" > for a woman who feels similarly. > > > Unfortunately, you too are right, Dave. I *do* feel like I'm running out of > time. Not fast, mind you. If I got somebody pregnant today, I would be > 55 years old when the kid graduated from college, which is perfectly ok. But > it's not too hard to visualize situation where I am 65 or even older when my > youngest kid got out of college. I don't want that -- I want to be young > enough to enjoy my kids and let them enjoy me. > > Certainly, those of us who are in this "shopping" situation bear a > responsibility to not be assholes. This applies to everyone else just as > much, however. Whether a relationship has gone on for ten days or ten years, > it can become clear that it is preventing you from going in the direction you > want to take. If so, you may decide to break the relationship to allow > yourself to go in that direction. But I think you still have a > responsibility to do this in the most considerate way possible. > -- > > Geoff Kuenning I only have one question are you looking for children or a close relation- ship? If it's just children you want, adopt. Many women do. Why try to put up with things that don't work and find that you are that much farther behind when the smoke clears. You are quite right about the time it takes to raise a child. My brother was a single parent for 3 years before he found the right lady. I know two women who have adopted children because of not finding that special relationship. Besides, in a lot of cases a child inhibites a relation- ship. A Beaver@Tektronix