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Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!cbosgd!cbsck!cbscc!swc
From: swc@cbscc.UUCP (Scott W. Collins)
Newsgroups: net.singles
Subject: An attempt at being funny
Message-ID: <4580@cbscc.UUCP>
Date: Fri, 11-Jan-85 11:14:14 EST
Article-I.D.: cbscc.4580
Posted: Fri Jan 11 11:14:14 1985
Date-Received: Sat, 12-Jan-85 07:54:12 EST
Organization: AT&T Bell Laboratories , Columbus
Lines: 65

|-*   <- ate a lemon

A story using some names of net.singles subscribers,
commonly (ab)used terms, and bad English:

-------------------------------------------------

Won "sunny" day when the reign was down to just a
slight "Driscoll", hour computer went on the "Fritzz".
The System Operators whirr "kirsten" at it when the
wizard, "Adolph" Fin, strolled inn (he must uv come
for a porpoise). "Can we ASCII you to look at our
musheen here, Mr Feen?".

He calmly put his coffee on "Topor" the disk drive (he
didn't remember to bring his cup, though).
After a glance at the CPU control panel (this model had
das blinken lites), he knew just what the problem wuz.
After inscribing the ailment to the SysOps, he then
"druid" on a peace of papel.

They awl grabbed an access panel and started yanking 
thingz out: a "Gadfly", a spotted "leeper", an ice-
Kareem "Koenig", "Anna Beaver".  "Great going", chimed
the Operators. "We're knot out of the \"Woods\" yet",
replied Fhin. The others grumbled amungst them*elves,
argooing about what could possumbly bee laughed to do.
"Don't \"Banta\" it about, fellas. Just give me a Handel...",
rebuked the might tea Wizard.

The "Vixie" tube display indickated a low voltage on
the light-panel bulb fill-a-mint tranzformer. The Wiz twiddled
some of the ferrite Coors and sore enough, the volt age
"Rosen" a little wile.

"Ah hah!", exclaimed the fearlust Mr. Finn. "Sumone [Sigma 1]
got "sic" and Up-"Chuqui"ed on one of the "Big Beast" Mammary
boreds.

Soon, the gloup had the Babbage macheen humming a long
a gain.  With hands on (rose) hips, the Wizard relackts
against the now-clozed acksex panels ant sed, "There's
moore thin won weigh two \"Skinner\" \"Katz\"".

"Owe, think ewe, Mr. Phinn, phor yoor halp". "Donut
\"Mensch\"ion it, guise", smiled Pfinn. "Now, to
off for sum excercise at the "Spa-fford" arrest."

Az \"Adolph\" lift the room, a SysOp smyled aphter
hymm and said, "Ah, that's \"Sargent\"leman and our scholar!"

"Our sediments eggs actly", echoed the udders.

----------------------------------------------

I hope y'all enjoyed this and dint takit searingly...


Scott W. Collins
..ihnp4!cbscc!swc

p.s.
	to thoze who tinks I shudder put this in net.jokes,
our Babbage doesn't subscribe to that newsgroup. Bedsides,
it mite nut "$make -f sense.mk"  to most of them.