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From: steph@nsc.UUCP (Steph Rutel)
Newsgroups: net.jokes,net.legal
Subject: Re: Justice in Arkansas
Message-ID: <2145@nsc.UUCP>
Date: Fri, 4-Jan-85 12:40:51 EST
Article-I.D.: nsc.2145
Posted: Fri Jan  4 12:40:51 1985
Date-Received: Mon, 7-Jan-85 03:18:50 EST
References: <1852@ucf-cs.UUCP>
Reply-To: steph@nsc.UUCP (Steph Rutel)
Organization: National Semiconductor, Sunnyvale
Lines: 54
Xref: watmath net.jokes:10183 net.legal:1215
Summary: 



.............I thought I would contribute some old, but "cute" and
  funny (at least I think so) yuks......

   Q. How many Californians does it take to screw in a lightbulb ?

   A. Californians don't screw in light bulbs...they screw in hot tubs !!

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   And then there was the story of Little Red Riding Hood on the way
 to visit her Grandmother. "Red" was a little concerned about walking
 through the woods all alone. After all, there were a lot of weirdos,
 especially wolves, out roamin' the woods these days.
   Being the smart young lady that she was, Red packed her Grandma's
 goodies...and then very carefully packed her .45 pistol into her
 basket. She put on her red cape, told her Mom goodby (who responded
 by telling her not to accept rides from strangers), picked up her
 basket and scooted off to her Grandma's house.
   Everything was going fine. However, her tra-la-la-ing was stopped
 short about three-fourths of the way through the forest when a big
 bad wolf jumped out from behind a tree !!

   Wolf: Now I've got you, Little Red Riding Hood !!! And I'm going
         to kill you right now, before you get to Grandma's house !

   Where upon Red reached into her picnic basket, pulled out her .45,
 put it right up to the wolf's nose and said....
 
  NO YOU'RE NOT !!!  YOU'RE GOING TO EAT ME, JUST LIKE IT SAYS IN THE BOOK !!


    (I SUPPOSE YOU HAD TO BE THERE ....)

   --------------------------------------------------------------------------

   And of course there is the true story (I actually listened to the incident
 while I was living in Portland, OR) of the lady newscaster assigned to do
 an update story on the Mount St. Helens eruptions.
    It seems that this lady (who shall remain nameless except to all those who
 actually saw the broadcast) was in a helicopter flying fairly close over the
 mountain when it spewed out a fairly large puff of steam. Now this 
 gal, wanting to be the professional that she thought she was, immediately
 responded with :

     (Please note this is not verbatim, but it does contain the spirit)

        Mount St. Helens has just had an erection !!!
                                         --------

       I wonder where her mind was ???
 
                                            STEPH'R @ NSC