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From: nessus@nsc.UUCP (Kchula-Rrit)
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: Re: deep woods research offensive to scandinavians
Message-ID: <2210@nsc.UUCP>
Date: Mon, 14-Jan-85 22:36:23 EST
Article-I.D.: nsc.2210
Posted: Mon Jan 14 22:36:23 1985
Date-Received: Tue, 15-Jan-85 05:42:35 EST
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Organization: The Patriarchy of Kzin
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     The joke about the Dane,Norwegian, and Swede reminded me of a couple of
others I read about in some books about Scandinavia:

From _T_h_e_ _S_c_a_n_d_i_n_a_v_i_a_n_s by Donald S. Connery p. 18:
[Reprinted without permission]

"     There are a good many stories dealing with national characteristics, and
it is the Scandinavians who tell them most avidly.  For example, two Danes, Two
Norwegians, two Finns and two Swedes are shipwrecked and cast up on a desert
island.  By the time they are rescued, the Danes have formed a cooperative, the
Norwegians have built a fishing vessel, the Finns have chopped down all the
trees and the Swedes are waiting to be introduced.  A variation of this tale
says that the Danes are making jokes, the Norwegians are fighting, the Finns are
drinking, and the Swedes are still waiting to be introduced.
     Another story tells of the four Scandinavians who get together to
manufacture a new product which will make them a lot of money.  The Finn designs
it, the Swede makes it, the Dane sells it, and the Norwegian complains about it.

Elsewhere in the book is the statement that "If a [Norwegian] farmer knows eight
languages, seven of them will be Norwegian".  Sounds like this country...

From Of Norwegian Ways by Bent Vanberg p.111-112:

"     ...The lutefisk[a Scandinavian food derived from fish] is rather unique...
and controversial.  Anti-lutefisk groups strongly maintain that this dish must
have been among the chief reasons that the Vikings left Norway; others suspect
it must more likely have been the Hardanger fiddle, or the complicated Norwegian
language situation.  If these groups are right, they should be reminded then
that the discovery of America should also be credited to the lutefisk.  Lutefisk
connoisseurs do not readily forgive those statements which the opposing forces
have issued, such as: "...inedible, a Norwegian horror, a Yuletide atrocity, a
taste that can only be experienced and not described, painfully embarrassing to
Norwegians, not adaptable to casual conversation, unsavorable, weird concoction,
hard on the nerves, a nightmare, a mess you would set in front of your worst
enemy, now it is there and now it isn't, lutefisk and other perversions." etc.,
etc.  In short, these opponents do not at all understand the significance of a
lutefisk dinner during the winter season.  The proponents of lutefisk, who
consider it one of the finest delicacies ever known to mankind, even go one step
further and compare it with gammelost(old cheese), another highlight of Norse
culinary folklore, which supposedly contributed to the victory of King Harald
Fair-haired at the battle of Hafrsfjord in the year 872, ... ...the King fed his
warriors gammelost for lunch prior to the battle, thereby turning them into
berserkers. ... Like any-thing Norwegian, gammelost is able to walk all by
itself after a certain span of time.  As for lutefisk, the 
world's largest processor is located in Minneapolis, Minnesota..."

P.S. I heard a recording of a Hardanger fiddle and it sounded very like a cat;
     Punk-rockers take note.

P.P.S.  Anyone wishing a sample of gammelost, please contact me. Lovely shades
        of green.  Guaranteed >6 months old, specify
        cheddar, American, Swiss, Neufchatel...

                                   Kchula-Rrit

"Imagine that, a Swedish kzin..."