Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.1 6/24/83; site ttidcc.UUCP Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!burl!ulysses!allegra!bellcore!decvax!genrad!teddy!panda!talcott!harvard!seismo!cmcl2!philabs!ttidca!ttidcc!hollombe From: hollombe@ttidcc.UUCP (Jerry Hollombe) Newsgroups: net.singles Subject: Suggestion for dealing with Jeff Message-ID: <183@ttidcc.UUCP> Date: Mon, 14-Jan-85 14:46:34 EST Article-I.D.: ttidcc.183 Posted: Mon Jan 14 14:46:34 1985 Date-Received: Sun, 20-Jan-85 00:40:58 EST Organization: TTI, Santa Monica, CA. Lines: 47 [] I was going to stay out of this mess, but when someone quoted one of my postings and attributed it to Jeff (with my name on the source line, yet) I decided enough was enough. All the flap about Jeff Sargent distracting the net reminds me of my experiences while working for the local suicide prevention hotline. Statistical analysis of our callers there revealed that 60% of the calls came from 20% of the callers. Repeat callers were a major problem and most of them sounded a lot like Jeff. (This is not to imply that Jeff is suicidal, though who knows?) Understand, these people were calling us because they had no one else to talk to, having long since burned out the tolerance of their friends and acquaintances, if any. Anyway, a general rule of thumb I used to teach trainees for the hot lines was "No more than three yes-buts allowed.". If you offer someone three suggestions and they respond with "Yes, but ..." to each one then you politely apologize for having nothing to help them and HANG UP. Continuing to talk to them after that point (and they can go on for *hours*) is a waste of your time and damaging to their psychological health. You're not helping them and you're encouraging their dependency on an inappropriate resource. Several articles have suggested that Jeff is treating the net as an SO or enjoying the yes-but games on the net. I think a better way to describe it is that Jeff is ADDICTED to the net. We have become an inappropriate resource for him. (Actually, I'm not sure that this sort of "therapy by consensus" is appropriate for anyone, but that's another subject.) Certainly he's had far more than his three yes-buts. I'm afraid it's time to hang up. Jeff, if you're reading this, I'm sorry, but it's apparent that no one here has a solution for you. Maybe your problems really are as hopeless as you think. Unless you have any positive suggestions I'm going to 'n' on to other things and I suggest that everyone else do the same. -- ============================================================================== ... sitting in a pile of junk on the runway, wondering what happened ... The Polymath (Jerry Hollombe) Citicorp TTI If thy CRT offend thee, pluck 3100 Ocean Park Blvd. it out and cast it from thee. Santa Monica, California 90405 (213) 450-9111, ext. 2483 {vortex,philabs}!ttidca!ttidcc!hollombe