Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.1 6/24/83; site decwrl.UUCP Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!cbosgd!ihnp4!zehntel!dual!decwrl!dec-rhea!dec-hyster!chuck From: chuck@hyster.DEC (Hyster::Hitchcock 264-6540) Newsgroups: net.singles Subject: Beliefs and What Works in Relationships Message-ID: <228@decwrl.UUCP> Date: Wed, 12-Dec-84 17:24:40 EST Article-I.D.: decwrl.228 Posted: Wed Dec 12 17:24:40 1984 Date-Received: Sat, 15-Dec-84 00:10:54 EST Sender: daemon@decwrl.UUCP Organization: DEC Engineering Network Lines: 65 Newsgroups: net.singles Path: decwrl!dec-rhea!dec-hyster!hitchcock Subject: Singles, Faith and What Works Posted: Tues 11:55:00 12/11/84 > The reason there are so many different sects is that they > disagree on the biblical validity of each other's stands on > a wide range of issues, including those of interest to > single adults. Martin has an enlightened attitude. To participate fully in one's religion yet remain aware of its relativity is a sign of someone who is in touch with how fragile beliefs actually are. What I haven't heard yet in this discussion is, How does what you believe work for you? As someone who is active in a pagan religion, I find that what I believe directly affects who I become involved with, because, like Martin, my religion works for me. But my tradition has a strong element of being "caretakers of the Earth." My SO is part of a native American Indian tradition with a similar bent. We meditate, do rituals to celebrate our connection with the elements, go to "gatherings of the clan," and generally work toward healing ourselves through our own human energy. The fact is, orthodox religions (especially Christianity) promote dominance over the earth, focus on divinity outside oneself (rather than coming from within) and hierarchical structures (rather than a decentralized form of organized chaos, which is more typical of contemporary pagan religions). Martin may be the exception to this, but as someone who went through getting a Masters in Theological Studies from a Methodist Seminary, I can tell you from first hand experience that he is the exception, Jeff is the rule. So what works? Well, I say that paganism and other decentralized Earth-oriented/Body-oriented religions are a more appropriate religion for singles for this day and age because it promotes the freedom to experiment with developing an equal partnership between you and your SO, it opens you up to our inherent aloneless in the world rather than masking it with a god who intercedes on your behalf (so you are confronted with developing a relationship of harmonic tension: seeing your SO as wholly other and a projection of your inner self, yet connected with you psychically in a way that goes beyond physical limitations). And ultimately, it forces you to take full responsibility for your actions especially in relationships because, to quote an old pagan saying: What you send out to the world, returns to you many times. And THAT belief has some pretty aMAZing affects with your SO in a world of deteriorating relationships. And although there are successful relationships between Christians (et al)--based on my *observations* (and confirmed by what Martin has already said) they're successful in spite of their religious basis. The appropriate question to ask at this point (because we can discuss the role of religion in relationships forever) is: What is YOUR criteria for a successful relationship? What qualities make a relationship WORK for you? Chuck ARPA: hitchcock%hyster.dec@decwrl.ARPA ENET: HYSTER::HITCHCOCK