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From: aeq@pucc-h (Jeff Sargent)
Newsgroups: net.singles
Subject: Re: The end of it
Message-ID: <1590@pucc-h>
Date: Fri, 21-Dec-84 01:55:04 EST
Article-I.D.: pucc-h.1590
Posted: Fri Dec 21 01:55:04 1984
Date-Received: Sat, 22-Dec-84 02:40:52 EST
References: <127@decwrl.UUCP>, <1839@sun.uucp> <1554@pucc-h>, <1881@sun.uucp>
Organization: my terminal
Lines: 42

>> = me
>  = Sunny Kirsten (sun!sunny)

>> ...one thing I hoped for was that I would show that Christians are human
>> too.  [] Sigh... Maybe one of these days I'll be human...
> You *are* human, Jeff.  You are a spirit incarnate in the material world.

Actually I inadvertently used "human" in two different, almost opposite,
senses in the article Sunny quoted.  The first use was to imply that Christians
(some of us, at least) do not necessarily have it all together, no matter what
their public pronouncements -- i.e. that being human meant having weaknesses
and problems.  In the second case, "human" was used as a synonym for "having it
all together".  The reason I sighed so wistfully for that is my assumption
(which I know will be widely challenged, but which I have yet to see disproved)
that I must get all my problems and struggles taken care of, cleaned up, put
utterly behind me, before I'll be tolerable (let alone desirable) to a woman
whom I would find desirable.  Mind you, I "know", rationally, that this is not
necessarily true; but that doesn't mean I know it at gut level -- i.e. I don't
believe it strongly enough to want to act on it.

> If you feel attracted to a particular woman, perhaps that IS a sign from God,
> for is not God's will incarnate in your spirit?  As long as you are listening
> to your spirit rather than your body, you *are* on the correct path, no?

Ah, but so much of my attraction comes largely from emotion as distinct from
either of the above.  So many times in the past I have been attracted to a
woman and only after her rejection of me discovered the root of some notable
emotional difficulty that made me want her desperately.  Thus I assume that
even now, when I actually seem to be in fairly good shape emotionally, that
any desire for a woman actually arises out of some deep, as yet undiagnosed
problem.  I would much prefer that God show me the problem directly, in the
privacy and safety of my own home, than require that I go out and get zapped
in order to get the problem fixed.  I'm tired of having my suffering increased
any time I try to ameliorate it.  (This does tie in with your point in a later
article about not holding forth needs on the initial approach to a MOTOS.)

I appreciate your constructive comments.

-- 
-- Jeff Sargent
{decvax|harpo|ihnp4|inuxc|ucbvax}!pur-ee!pucc-h:aeq
Jesus has creched the devil's system.