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From: aeq@pucc-h (Jeff Sargent)
Newsgroups: net.singles
Subject: Re: The Start of Something New (I hope)
Message-ID: <1617@pucc-h>
Date: Fri, 28-Dec-84 01:42:26 EST
Article-I.D.: pucc-h.1617
Posted: Fri Dec 28 01:42:26 1984
Date-Received: Sat, 29-Dec-84 01:42:38 EST
References: <2743@ncsu.UUCP> <1567@pucc-h>, <1889@sun.uucp>
Organization: my terminal
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From Sunny Kirsten (sun!sunny):

> Perhaps what you "Go for" is the problem.  I obviously don't know what you're
> going for, but an example:  If you approach a woman and ask her to go to bed,
> you may rarely get what you want, and otherwise will find near total rejection
> and total loneliness.  If, on the other hand, you approach her not as a sex
> object but as a person, who also might be lonely, and simply try to share with
> her the joy in your life, you may find a friend, and not be lonely.  If you
> approach with needs, you're more likely to be rejected than if you approach
> with something to offer, like evidence that you enjoy life, and that being
> with you is likely to be an enjoyable time.

I know better than to ask a woman to go to bed right off the bat (even though
that may be what I want).  On the other hand, I have had in the past a tendency
to approach women not as persons but as goddesses, seeking their forgiveness
and acceptance.  (Believe it or not, I've also been on the flip side of that
situation twice -- i.e. the woman apparently seeking all that from me.)  I have
indeed wanted to go to bed with women, but not just to get my rocks off, not
just viewing them as sex objects; rather, it was because I can think of no more
powerful demonstration of acceptance to a man than a woman's opening herself to
sex with him.  Don't bother with followups telling me that this is the wrong
approach to women and relationships with them; I know that now; but I'm not
sure how well I could handle relating as you describe.

-- 
-- Jeff Sargent
{decvax|harpo|ihnp4|inuxc|ucbvax}!pur-ee!pucc-h:aeq
Proud owner of two Control Data doorstops.