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From: arndt@lymph.DEC
Newsgroups: net.flame
Subject: Flame broiled veal/$ scheme!
Message-ID: <203@decwrl.UUCP>
Date: Tue, 11-Dec-84 10:59:45 EST
Article-I.D.: decwrl.203
Posted: Tue Dec 11 10:59:45 1984
Date-Received: Thu, 13-Dec-84 03:25:55 EST
Sender: daemon@decwrl.UUCP
Organization: DEC Engineering Network
Lines: 51

Hey ho, I got this WONDERFUL idea on how to fit the product to the market.

            *****  OLE MACDONALD'S TORTURE FARMS  *****

You see, in the old days a guy came home and went down to the dungeon and
relaxed by stretching some poor wretch on the rack or fooling around with
hot pokers.  Work out all the day's frustrations before supper and really
get the juices flowing!  You get the idea.

In today's wimp society we have to be 'nice' to everyone.  Even the victims.
So it looks like, for now at least, using people is out.  (Except for the
black market where you pay the victim on a prorated scale for the use of 
his/her body)  Soooooooo.  

Enter OLE MACDONALD'S TORTURE FARMS!  

A family kind of drive in place where you can rent a small stainless steel
room (with a drain) and buy an animal of your choice along with the use of 
the instruments of your choice.

I can see it all now!  Mom and the kids out front eating bergs and dogs,
(it's a natural to serve food you see) and the 'man' of the house out back
doing what comes naturally.  

Each room fitted with muzak and soundproofed.  Think of the classical and
rock tunes you could work by!

Feature the animal of the month.  The instrument of the month.  Contests.
Discount coupons.  Dishes.  Stuffed animals for the kids. 

Get some animal rights people to whip up free advertising.  Go on all the
talk shows.  New wave.  Freedom of expression.  Enter the ACLU.  On your
side of course.  A couple of theologians from big name Eastern Seminaries
allowing as how it is a religious experience.

Subcontract work from the big pharmaceutical houses.  Sell renderings to the
pet food industry.

And then FRANCHISE!!!!

---------------------------------------

Whata ya say gang?  Anyone out there want to buy stock in my venture?

Rich Rosen?  Gordon A. Muffin?  Sophie Quigly?  Ken Perlow?

Anyone out there think it couldn't happen?  Wouldn't sell?

Keep chargin'

Ken Arndt