Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.1 6/24/83 (MC840302); site prlb2.UUCP Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!bonnie!akgua!mcnc!philabs!cmcl2!seismo!mcvax!prlb2!ronse From: ronse@prlb2.UUCP (Ronse) Newsgroups: net.jokes Subject: RE: two jokes Message-ID: <396@prlb2.UUCP> Date: Fri, 30-Nov-84 09:19:24 EST Article-I.D.: prlb2.396 Posted: Fri Nov 30 09:19:24 1984 Date-Received: Tue, 4-Dec-84 05:52:21 EST Organization: PHILIPS Research Laboratory Brussels Lines: 43 [] The joke about the man betting that he could piss straight in a glass from the other side of the bar reminds me this one: A secret policeman noticed a man hurrying through central Prague with a suspicious-looking bag under his arm. ``Hey, you there!'' he shouted. ``Stop where you are. What have you got in that bag?'' The man opened the bag, which proved to be full of banknotes. ``Where did all the money come from?'' asked the secret policeman suspiciously. ``I'm a professional gambler. I won all that money in bets.'' ``I will only believe you if you can show me here and now that you really are an expert gambler,'' said the secret policeman sternly. ``All right, then. I bet you 500 coruna that I can bite my eye.'' The secret policeman accepted the wager. The man proceeded to remove his glass eye and bite it. ``I'm still not satisfied,'' said the secret policeman. ``You must give me further proof of your talents.'' ``I bet you 500 coruna that I can bite my other eye.'' ``You're on,'' said the policeman. The man removed his false teeth, bit his other eye and relieved the secret policeman of a further 500 coruna. The secret policeman was furious. ``That's just cheap trick,'' he shouted. ``You've still not proved to me that you really are a professional gambler. I demand one more piece of proof.'' ``I bet you 500 coruna that I can piss in your boot and it will smell just like rose-water.'' The secret policeman eagerly accepted, convinced that such a thing was impossible. He took off his boot and the man pissed in it. He sniffed the boot. It smelt not of roses, but of piss. ``Aha!'' said the secret policeman. ``Now you must pay me back five hundred coruna. You're not so damned clever after all.!'' The man paid back 500 coruna and turned to go. ``There's just one thing,'' said the secret policeman. ``You must have known that you could'nt piss rose-water. So why did you suggest the bet in the first place?'' ``Look at the crowd of people over there,'' said the man. ``Each one of them bet a thousand coruna that I wouldn't dare piss in your boot.''