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From: saquigley@watmath.UUCP (Sophie Quigley)
Newsgroups: net.kids
Subject: Re: Mother needs no excuse
Message-ID: <10077@watmath.UUCP>
Date: Thu, 29-Nov-84 18:17:29 EST
Article-I.D.: watmath.10077
Posted: Thu Nov 29 18:17:29 1984
Date-Received: Fri, 30-Nov-84 05:51:40 EST
References: <119@osu-eddie.UUCP>, <4177@cbscc.UUCP>
Organization: U of Waterloo, Ontario
Lines: 55


>It is not my intent here to make those in "two-career" families feel bad.  I
>understand there are good reasons for this and don't begrudge anyone there
>choice in this matter.  But I'd like them to understand the other side of
>the picture.  There are some (most visibly feminist leaders) who are saying
>that parents really don't know how best to raise their children, indicating
>that we should turn the job over to "experts".  I think this is only a
>justification for doing their own thing with a pretense of having the
>child's best intrests in mind.  To me parenthood involves more than just
>giving birth to offspring.  Of course that doesn't make us "expert" parents.
>(Who defines what an "expert" in parenting is anyway?)  Being a parent has
>as much importance in the growth of the adult parent as it does for the child.
>-- 
>The "resurrected",
>
>Paul Dubuc	cbscc!pmd
>
Whoooooo!!!  which "feminist leaders" are you talking about here? 
First I am not even sure of what you mean by a "feminist leader", but if what
you meant was "prominent feminists" instead, I want names!!!!   

I haven't heard of any feminists claiming that "experts" would be able to do
a better job of parenting than parents are, except maybe for some old-school
feminists like Simone de Beauvoir.  I have read books by prominent contemporary
feminists (Deirdre English, Barbara Eirenreich try reading their book "For her
own good: 150 years of the experts' advices to women") claiming just the
opposite.  Prominent "experts" on child care have often been men who usually
did not raise children themselves: Jean-Jacques Rousseau had his 4 children
put in an orphanage; Skinner treated his daughter like a guinea pig by putting
her in a box (sure it was a nice box, but still a box);  I don't really know
about Dr Spock.

If there is any trend that I have noticed in feminist writings, it is
certainly a dislike for "experts" simply because "experts" have so often
claimed so many things about women which were completely erroneous and
even often dangerous (witness the current trend of high-tech intervention
during childbirth).  The "self-help" movement in health care is mainly a
feminist movement.  So be careful who you point your finger at.  You are 
dead wrong in this case.

True, many feminists are pro-daycare.  But the reasons they usually give
for this have more to do with economics and freedom of choice rather than
trying to pretend that it is better for the children involved .  In some
cases day-care is better, not because the "experts" know better, but because
these are cases where the parents would end up abusing the children because
of the resentment they might feel towards them for "tying them down" and
lowering their economic situation.  If the parents don't enjoy parenting
or enjoy it, but couldn't stand doing it on a full time basis, then the
children are probably better off in daycare.

Feminists might be pro-daycare but they are often also usually the ones pushing
for parental benefits such as maternal and paternal leave.

Sophie Quigley
...!{clyde,ihnp4,decvax}!watmath!saquigley