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From: williams@kirk.DEC (John Williams 223-3402)
Newsgroups: net.singles
Subject: The end of it
Message-ID: <127@decwrl.UUCP>
Date: Mon, 3-Dec-84 18:10:10 EST
Article-I.D.: decwrl.127
Posted: Mon Dec  3 18:10:10 1984
Date-Received: Wed, 5-Dec-84 00:12:02 EST
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	I have a friend at work who likes to use a particular 
quote on occasion. I will present it to you now. The more you 
stir, the more it stinks. I have been overwhelmed by the activity 
that surrounds this newsgroup. Sunny once asked me whether or not 
this was a psyche experiment. I'm afraid it's a case of psyche 
overkill. I think that alot of psychological crap has been 
stuffed down Jeff's throat, that the motivation was not 
necessarily in his best interest. Small wonder he is unwilling to 
subject himself further into any sort of therapy. The primary 
focus of therapy is to provide an environment where the client is 
able to gain some form of emotional experience with minimal risk.
I think that all the manure people have been feeding him is only 
serving to reinforce a foundational belief that psychology is 
some kind of fucking game, rather than a practice of science. I 
think the best possible thing to do would be for all those 
involved to stay away from Jeff, until such time as you find 
yourself more in agreement. If he indeed has a problem, and I am 
not as of yet convinced, he will seek help himself. Any attempts 
on either part to change the fundamental beliefs of the other 
will only end in tragedy. Jeff does not have to do anything he 
does not want to do. Period. And neither do any of you. What you 
are doing, whether you realize it or not, is saying that he needs 
some kind of help because he has an opinion that is inconsistent 
with your own. If this difference appears to be unresolvable, 
then perhaps you should just leave it at that. It appears as 
though that relationship, be as it is, is divergent, and I see 
no way that it could result in anything even closely resembling 
being mutually beneficial. Jeff is a nonconformist. If he wants 
to stay that way, he should be prepared to accept the fact that 
he is going to have trouble relating to people. He should be with 
people who will not be so critical of his beliefs, blaming them 
on something that is supposedly wrong with him, but with those 
who show stronger similarities. If he finds these people rare, he 
will have to choose for himself which he finds more important.
Something I think Jeff should know, is that if he wishes 
emotional counseling, with people more tolerant, he should 
remember that psychological therapists are PROFESSIONALS. They 
are very careful not to submit their clients to anything they 
don't want. Their success depends on your success. There is kind 
of a falsehood that manifests itself with many people, that is 
that a therapist performs some kind of `` surgery '' to your 
mind. On the contrary, it is the amateurs that slice up all sorts 
of things that are better off left alone. A professional 
therapist is not there as a doctor as much as he's there as a 
teacher, to teach you about yourself. To give you a little 
starting experience in identifying your emotions. He is not there 
to change you in any way. He will give you the tools you need to 
work on your own problems. And he has the experience to do so.
He will try to make sure your mind comes through intact. With the 
rise of popular psychology and quack diagnosis, it is 
increasingly important to understand what it really is, and not 
to base your ego on what others may misinform you. A really good 
therapist makes the session fun. And that's what it should be. It 
is primarily an educational experience, no one puts you under a 
fucking microscope. The relationships you have should be 
recognized as constructive or destructive. Only you know enough 
to decide. Jeff needs amateur counseling like another hole in the 
head. My advice is to lay off the trash in pursuit of some 
philanthropic ideal, and get on with whatever lives you do have.
If Jeff gets lonely, that's his business. It may be the only way 
he will be able to identify a problem, if it exists. People have 
been known to go more or less their own separate ways. If there 
is little that you agree on, little you will ever agree on, then 
why bother? If a cause becomes more important than a 
relationship, then perhaps that person should be free to promote 
whatever that cause may be elsewhere. 

	In any case, I see no reason to attack. From what I have 
read in this newsgroup, without the supposed benefit of meeting 
him personally, I see no malicious intent. Perhaps it is to my 
benefit in not knowing him that I can give an objective opinion.
I only know what I have seen posted, and what I have received in 
the mail, and think that this whole thing is getting blown way 
out of proportion. Myself included.

	Let everyone have their say, no matter how ridiculous.
We ultimately solve our own problems.

	Now back to being silly.

					----{ john williams }----

	< Don't forget to vote for Village Idiot >

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