Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.1 6/24/83; site abnjh.UUCP Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!burl!ulysses!mhuxj!mhuxn!mhuxl!abnjh!lute From: lute@abnjh.UUCP (J. Collymore) Newsgroups: net.singles Subject: Re: Interracial Dating in Hawaii Message-ID: <875@abnjh.UUCP> Date: Wed, 3-Oct-84 12:15:18 EDT Article-I.D.: abnjh.875 Posted: Wed Oct 3 12:15:18 1984 Date-Received: Fri, 5-Oct-84 06:02:46 EDT References: <865@abnjh.UUCP>, <1201@drutx.UUCP> Organization: ATTIS, NJ Lines: 45 Lori Fuller's point is well taken. I should have clarified that from my brief stay (and experience in Hawaii) it was easier to date black/white than it was on the mainland. I did learn that there is racism in Hawaii, but of a sort I was ignorant of. I was told that there is a great deal of self-monitor- ed separatism between the Japanese, Chinese and Koreans. There are also other prejudices I heard of. For example, I was told to be wary of Tongans. I asked: "Why?" "What does a Tongan LOOK like, anyway?" There was a whole breakdown of the different Pacific groups, and their differences. There are Filipinos, Hawaiians, Polynesians, Samoans, Tongans, Fiji Islanders, etc. All with their own distinct cultures, preferences and prejudices towards one and other. In truth, I was not there long enough to learn what the various race distinctions were. My own experience that prompted my comment in my earlier article was that when I was out there in 1982, I was on a date. My date was white. When we went intoa Pizza Hut to eat, all my long-held defense shields went right up. In this case, it was the internal preparations one makes to handle the stares and side-long glances one must bear when IRD, when entering a public eating place. (Please note that in the parts of the U.S. and Canada I have travelled these stares come also when I enter such places alone.) Anyway, the thing that amazed me was that within seconds of entering, I noticed that no one (not even the kids behind the counter) was paying us the slightest attention! It was a VERY strange feeling. Imagine, all my life I had been developing these defenses to keep myself from feeling pain, and now I was in a place where I'd normally expect to need them, and I DIDN'T need them. To be honest, it actually had me confused and frightened for a while. But it was also uplifting to realize that I was still in the U.S. and, as a black, for once, be out some place and not feel the eyes of others upon me! It actually gave me some hope. Unfortunately, I learned that there are racial problems out there, too. However, they don't impact on me as directly as they do here on the mainland. This all reminds me of some of the lyrics to that song in "South Pacific" that goes something like: "You've got to be taught from year to year, You've got to be taught to hate and fear, You have to be carefully taught, You have to be carefully taught." (Throughout the world, I'm afraid that's "more truth than poetry.") Jim Collymore