Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.1 6/24/83; site watmath.UUCP Path: utzoo!linus!decvax!ittvax!dcdwest!sdcsvax!sdcrdcf!hplabs!tektronix!uw-beaver!cornell!vax135!houxm!mhuxj!mhuxl!mhuxt!mhuxm!sftig!sftri!sfmag!eagle!ulysses!burl!clyde!watmath!idallen From: idallen@watmath.UUCP Newsgroups: net.singles Subject: Re: friends and intimacy; drawing the platonic line Message-ID: <9321@watmath.UUCP> Date: Mon, 8-Oct-84 00:28:39 EDT Article-I.D.: watmath.9321 Posted: Mon Oct 8 00:28:39 1984 Date-Received: Tue, 9-Oct-84 08:32:58 EDT References: <584@pucc-i> Organization: U of Waterloo, Ontario Lines: 18 > From: aaz@pucc-i (Marc Mengel) > Why is it that people can't be intimate and still be friends?? I have a friend who is a lover (and a lover who is a friend, but that's not the relationship of interest in this discussion). She's been away in the USA for some years now, but we manage to visit each other every now and then. Whether or not we "are intimate" when together depends on how our respective emotional lives are. Some visits, the only "intimacy" we share is the same sleeping place. I like this relationship; we understand each other well, and the intimacy is non-jealous and very pleasant. Now, since one's lovers really should be one's friends too, when one adds intimacy to a friendship, it's hard to tell it apart from a lovers' relationship. A difference in degree, perhaps, but not in kind. And I think that's the way it ought to be. -- -IAN! (Ian! D. Allen) University of Waterloo