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Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!bonnie!akgua!sdcsvax!sdcrdcf!hplabs!tektronix!tekigm!jameso
From: jameso@tekigm.UUCP (James E. Ormond)
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: Offensive to followers of Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh
Message-ID: <221@tekigm.UUCP>
Date: Fri, 12-Oct-84 15:32:21 EDT
Article-I.D.: tekigm.221
Posted: Fri Oct 12 15:32:21 1984
Date-Received: Sun, 14-Oct-84 08:10:10 EDT
Organization: Tektronix, Beaverton OR
Lines: 67



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As many of you know, we Oregonians are blessed :-) by the presence of the
followers of Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh.  We are especially fond of the
Bhagwan's personal secretary, Sheela (double :-)).

The following "notice" has been floating around a few places.

	    The Oregon State Department of Fish and Wildlife

The 1984-85 Big Game season in the state of Oregon will be closed due to
the shortage of big game animals.  The following will not be hunted within
this state's boundaries this season:  dear, elk, antelope, bear, cougar,
and squirrels.

However, in the place of the game animals, there will be an open season
on the central eastern Rajneesh, known locally as the Red Rats or Red Vermin.

These Red Rats may be a little rough to dress out, and if gut shot, probably
not worth the effort.

IT WILL BE UNLAWFUL TO:

1.	Hunt in a party of over 700 hunters.

2.	Use more than 50 attack dogs in one group.

3.	Use less than a 25 caliber rifle or 00 buckshot (they are thick
	skinned).

TRAPPING REGULATIONS:	

1.	Traps may not be set within 50 feet of a voting booth.

2.	Traps may not be baited with a virgin, food stamps, welfare
	stamps, or a Rolls Royce.

3.	All traps must have not less than a 120 pound spring.  The trap
	jaws must be kept sharp and in good working order.

OTHER RULES AND REGULATIONS:

1.	It is unlawful to possess a road-killed Red Rat.  It is OK to
	hit one, but don't pick the bastard up.

2.	It is unlawful to use any recorded or amplified device to trap
	a Red Rat, with the exception of the following: a recording of
	Crystal Gayle's "Don't It Make Your Brown Eyes Blue".

HOW TO KNOW WHEN A RED RAT IS IN THE AREA:

1.	You spot a Rolls Royce with a deaf mute in the back seat.

2.	You see 5 or 6 Rolls Royces together.

3.	Disposable diapers thrown on the street.

4.	Large line outside the Wasco County Welfare Office.

5.	Empty books of food stamps thrown on the ground.

HUNTING ATTIRE:

1.	Obviously, red hunting vests should be exchanged for a different
	color.