Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.2 9/17/84 chuqui version 1.7 9/23/84; site nsc.UUCP Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!burl!ulysses!mhuxj!ihnp4!nsc!chuqui From: chuqui@nsc.UUCP (Zonker T. Chuqui) Newsgroups: net.singles Subject: Re: Picking up on Women's Signals (Part II): Phone Numbers Message-ID: <1576@nsc.UUCP> Date: Sat, 13-Oct-84 04:51:02 EDT Article-I.D.: nsc.1576 Posted: Sat Oct 13 04:51:02 1984 Date-Received: Sun, 14-Oct-84 06:57:27 EDT References: <886@abnjh.UUCP> Organization: The Warlocks Cave, Castrovalva Lines: 37 > A point to be considered when asking for a woman's phone number is this: > > Don't ask for a woman's phone number unless you seriously intend to call her! > > I have learned that when a woman gives you her phone number, you are getting > a very valuable possesion from her. Hear! Hear! When you look at the front page of any metropolitan paper, you can see what the shape of the world is in. For a person to let a relatively perfect stranger into their lives is a BIG step. Especially for a woman (that is not an anti-woman comment, but a statement of fact-- a lot of really disgusting crime IS aimed against women). When I was dating I found that giving them my phone number instead worked quite well for a number of reasons. If/when I ever decide to start dating again I'll go back to it, too. First, it gives them a chance to think it over instead of having to work by pure instinct, a very stressful situation for many people. Second, it shows that I'm interested enough to break down my own privacy for them. Finally, and most important, it gives them a hook that they can use to contact me (or have the authorities track me down if I AM an axe murderer or something (oh, for the record, I'm not-- they dropped charges on it...). This makes them MUCH less vulnerable. I normally don't ask for phone numbers at all, but usually after I offer my own I would get one anyway, and if not, I got a fair percentage of calls. But then, I have such an honest face... *snicker* Anything you can do to help them trust you will help immensely. Because of the world we live in most people have enormous walls protecting them from reality. The trick is not to find the chink in the armor, but the key to the lock. chuq -- From the Department of Bistromatics: Chuq Von Rospach {cbosgd,decwrl,fortune,hplabs,ihnp4,seismo}!nsc!chuqui nsc!chuqui@decwrl.ARPA How about 'reason for living?'