Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP
Posting-Version: version B 2.10.1 6/24/83; site dmcnh.UUCP
Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!burl!ulysses!mhuxj!houxm!ihnp4!zehntel!dual!amd!decwrl!decvax!ittvax!sii!dmcnh!gts
From: gts@dmcnh.UUCP
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: NEW CONTEST
Message-ID: <148@dmcnh.UUCP>
Date: Sat, 22-Sep-84 14:17:10 EDT
Article-I.D.: dmcnh.148
Posted: Sat Sep 22 14:17:10 1984
Date-Received: Wed, 26-Sep-84 06:11:57 EDT
Distribution: net
Organization: Datamedia Corp, Nashua, NH
Lines: 40

[kills bugs dead kill dead bugs dead bugs kill, um....]

OK.  We all like to have a laugh at the expense of others,
right?  In this light, I suggest a new contest.
RULES:
1. The object is to unearth the most incomprehensible, bizzarre,
   or just plain ridiculous statement ever made on the net.
2. Only part of an article need be entered;  taking things out of
   context is not only encouraged, but fun too.
3. You may enter an anonymous posting (especially useful when it's
   your own) but putting a name on it gives us someone to make fun
   of.  Hint:  try using the names of people you don't like!
4. Every newsgroup is fair hunting ground.  Here's your chance to
   delve into those newsgroups that were seemingly made for this
   contest, i.e., net.philosophy and net.rec.nude.  Hint:  try
   net.religion!
5. The grand prize will be a readnews program that automatically
   skips over articles posted from Pucc*.
  *Pucc is a registered trademark of those students who couldn't
   get into Rose-Hulman (THE Indiana University).
6. Winners will be determined by sheer volume only, quality has no
   place on the net.  The decision of our judges is open to flaming.

To get the ball rolling here is my submission:

*********************************************************************
From: mvs@alice.UUCP (Mark V. Shaney)
Newsgroups: net.singles
Subject: Re: data processing

> ...............................................................Well
> welcome to the fact that many women need to have him accuse someone
> else of being an ai project........................................
> _-_-_-_-Mark
*********************************************************************

-From the asbestos-lined, teflon-coated mailbox of:
 ><..!decvax!ittvax!sii!dmcnh!gts
"Gee, I wonder if anyone will think to enter THIS article into the contest.
 Nah...."