Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.1 6/24/83; site pucc-k Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!bonnie!akgua!sdcsvax!sdcrdcf!hplabs!zehntel!ihnp4!inuxc!pur-ee!CS-Mordred!Pucc-H:Pucc-I:Pucc-K:agz From: agz@pucc-k (Andrew Banta) Newsgroups: net.singles,net.kids Subject: Re: Re: Interracial Dating Message-ID: <440@pucc-k> Date: Sat, 13-Oct-84 15:57:34 EDT Article-I.D.: pucc-k.440 Posted: Sat Oct 13 15:57:34 1984 Date-Received: Tue, 16-Oct-84 03:17:46 EDT References: <3860@decwrl.UUCP> <934@houxm.UUCP> Organization: Dept. of Mental Instability, Purdue University Lines: 67 Xref: 4695 624 > ... more from Lisa, probably sarcastic ... > >> Actually, kids like kids. They have to be taught that this neat new person >> who's the same height and has the same interests and is otherwise interesting >> is really icky. Adults teach them that "different" skin colors are ugly. > > Yeah, but who's going to teach them? Ok, you, your husband, perhaps some of > your relatives, friends and neighbors. You can't really count on anyone else > though, and more than likely they will teach your kids the opposite, that > they are different. > > I'm not so sure of the above either ("Kids like kids"). I don't know, perhaps > it might be my own experience. (First of all, let's define kids here -- I > think you might be thinking of young children, perhaps 5-10. I think I am > thinking of 11-16. Where did you even get the idea that she was being sarcastic? I didn't take it sarcastically the first time I saw it, and still don't. Now, before I continue here, a few points that I'd like to make (my opinions, if you will). First, I don't think that it is only the WASP parenets that say the other skin colours, religions, cultures, etc, are "icky". I think that a fair portion of the other races, religions, and cultures also teach this. Second, I don't think that it is necessarily always the parents (or other adults) that teach this to kids. I think that a fair numbe rof kids learn it from other kids. Obviously not ALL kids do, since it has to start somewhere. I also think that TV may have a bit of an impact on this. How many shows have done something on interracial dating, in which the basic message has been that it is alright, but the underlying tone the entire show is that there is something wrong with it? Ok, now that we have gotten this out of the way, where did you (Greg) get the idea that there is that much antipathy between kids in the first place? I think there is alot of playful competition, and harrassing, but I never really thought that there was hate from a majority. I think kids will realize on there own that they are different. I also think that even though they realize they are different and others realize that they are different, they are still treated ok. We seem to be breaking this up into two different age groups, so: in the 5-10 age group, I don't really think that kids are that much different. I don' think that kids realize they are that much different, either. As Greg said, they play together, and generally seem to get along ok. In the 11-16 age group, things do change. There seems to be more "hunting" of the opposite sex, so they have to classify what is wanted and what isn't. I also think that be y these ages, kids have realized that they should be tolerant of other groups, and in many cases that there is actually nothing wrong. It wasn't that long ago that I was in that age range, and other than some real beligerent a**holes, everybody got along fine. There were quite a few ethnic and racist jokes flying around, but it was in fun. Most people saw no real reason to get down on other people, and didn't. So my question is that where did this attitude that kids of interracial mariages would be harrassed anyway? I think as soon as you point this out to a (your) kid, he'll be watching for it, and find it, simply because he/she has different attitude toward how people will treat him. I f you bring him up without teaching him that people are different in this aspect, he probably won't notice it as much. Just something to keep in mind ... ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Andy Banta {decvax!allegra!ihnp4}!pur-ee!pucc-k!agz Dept. of Mental Instability, Purdue University --- "I'm OK, You're a CS Major" ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ "And in the quiet that followed, We realized that there was little difference at all ... "