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From: lute@abnjh.UUCP (J. Collymore)
Newsgroups: net.singles
Subject: Interracial Dating
Message-ID: <865@abnjh.UUCP>
Date: Thu, 27-Sep-84 17:26:30 EDT
Article-I.D.: abnjh.865
Posted: Thu Sep 27 17:26:30 1984
Date-Received: Tue, 2-Oct-84 01:42:27 EDT
Organization: ATTIS, NJ
Lines: 45

I have taken quite some interest in the discussion that has begun on 
interracial dating (ird) on the net.  I would like to thank Greg Skinner for
sharing some of his (and his family's) experiences with us on the net.  There
was also another fellow who mentioned his experiences, also, who I'd like to
thank.  It's nice to know that I'm not alone.

I believe that in the U.S. and Canada, IRD is considered by many (particularly
those of us over 25) to be a taboo subject.  In my own personal experience
I have found over the years that the only place one will get almost no hassles
IRD is in Hawaii.  A sad but true fact.  For the rest of us, there are all
the usual problems:  people (including "friends" sometimes) staring,
unseemly looks or remarks, people avoiding you, tunrdowns for dates because
"mommy and daddy would be VERY upset" (as if you're asking for marriage instead
of a date), friends trying to "talk you out of this counter-productive
interest," etc.  No, it is no picnic for the most part.

I'd like to think that things were as easy, and natural as a fellow said
just a few days ago in this newsgroup, that (and I am paraphrasing here)
IRD is (or should be) a non-issue and it doesn't even need to be discussed.
I hate to tell you though, get your head out of the sand!  Not discussing a
subject that has broken many hearts, will not make it go away, or make the
world and easier place to live in, or make people re-evaluate their attitudes
and responses on the subject!  Only from confronting and discussing the issue
can the beginnings of change take place.  Maybe I am wrong, but the
world seems only marginally more agreeable to IRD than it was when I was first
starting to date as a teenager in the turbulent late 60's (in "liberal" New
York State).

I hope someday soon I will be able to feel freer to share some of my
experiences in this area with you (they have not all been bad).  But until
that time I encourage the rest of you to discuss this issue so that 
eventually this subject does become a non-issue.


				Jim Collymore


p.s.  If you haven't yet realized it... I'm black.




"I have a dream...that some day my children will not be judged by the color
of their skin, but by the content of their character..."