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From: referee@sdccsu3.UUCP (Cindy the Referee)
Newsgroups: net.women.only
Subject: Re:  friendships among women
Message-ID: <1910@sdccsu3.UUCP>
Date: Sat, 9-Jun-84 13:58:54 EDT
Article-I.D.: sdccsu3.1910
Posted: Sat Jun  9 13:58:54 1984
Date-Received: Tue, 12-Jun-84 00:29:38 EDT
References: <7838@watmath.UUCP>, <385@drutx.UUCP>
Organization: UCSD Computer Center Consulting Office
Lines: 33

>>A:    ...the bonds of female friendship in America are not very strong.
>>JAM:  ...friendships among girls/women [are] much closer than those that 
	   men seem to have.

Comparison of Men's and Women's Friendships

            Men                               Women
     --------------------------          --------------------------
     Group-oriented                      Individually-oriented
     Competitive                         Supportive
     Information conversations           Emotional conversations
     Harder to make new friends          Easier to make new friends

NOTE:  These are by no means absolute criteria, just general tendencies.

The reason that women's friendships deteriorate when one acquires an SO
may be the popular belief that "you can only have ONE best friend", as
JAM says.  If you believe that...  Men's friendships, being group-oriented,
are able to survive the arrival of a new SO, but look at the built-in 
conflicts of men's friendships!  I think the reason why ANY friendship
falls apart is because at least one person changes, and the two people
can't resolve the conflict by accepting the changes.

Now, if you are concerned about meeting other women professionals who
understand the problems of being in a male-dominated occupation,
perhaps your employer has a women's support group, and there is also
SWE--the Society of Women Engineers, an organization where I've made a
lot of friends.  Or if you have other special interests, join an
appropriate special interest group.  Involvement is the key.

-- 
Cindy
[...]sdcsvax!sdccsu3!referee