Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.1 6/24/83; site abnjh.UUCP Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!floyd!vax135!houxz!houxm!mhuxl!abnjh!lute From: lute@abnjh.UUCP (J. Collymore) Newsgroups: net.singles Subject: Re: Are BEAUTIFUL women insecure? Message-ID: <694@abnjh.UUCP> Date: Wed, 20-Jun-84 09:44:53 EDT Article-I.D.: abnjh.694 Posted: Wed Jun 20 09:44:53 1984 Date-Received: Thu, 21-Jun-84 07:16:15 EDT Organization: ATTIS, NJ Lines: 50 Over a year ago I asked the same question: "Why do attractive women go out with"JERKS?" I had found an interesting explanation for this, so for the benefit of those who didn't see it, here's a re-posting of my earlier article. "A few months ago I read a letter in a magazine from a man that was confused about why many of the women he found attractive went out with guys that were real (to put it nicely) JERKS! To be honest, when I was an undergrad (8+ years ago) I found that to be a disturbingly common happening. Even today in the "real world" I see this situation more times than I like. In college, (and even today at the verge of turning 30) it always seems you're damned if the woman you are interested in calls you a: nice guy, good friend, gentleman, etc. Although you may then become that woman's confidant, brother, counselor, etc. you can be pretty sure that you will NOT be all that passionately intimate (this assumes that you, as the guy, wanted passion in the first place). Now don't anyone misconstrue my position to be that I am against men and women being friends, that is NOT TRUE! I merely pose the point that (as someone who has for years been called a "nice guy") it is confusing that a number of women choose to have "nice guys" as platonic friends, and not-so-nice guys as lovers. Well, to get back to my original point, in the above person's letter he posed the reason for this mismatching on something he called the "Principle of Less Interest." This principle states that: The person with less interest in the relationship dictates the terms of the relationship. This implies, that acting like a JERK is a position of showing less interest in the relationship. The person having more interest in turn puts up with a lot of garbage in an attempt to raise the other person's level of interest. This, in turn, can cause the latter person to invest so much emotional energy that they become reluctant to drop the relationship even though they know they are getting a raw deal. This can also suggest that the "nice guy" that comes along doesn't offer the same level of emotional stimulation as the current (or previous) JERK, and therefore seems comparatively boring. (Most people want to date someone stimulating, NOT boring!) How does this sound to the rest of you net.singles readers? Any other opinions out there?" I, too, would be interested in getting the views of the female net.singles readers on this subject. Jim Collymore