Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site umcp-cs.UUCP Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!burl!ulysses!mhuxl!houxm!houxz!vax135!floyd!cmcl2!seismo!rlgvax!cvl!umcp-cs!mark From: mark@umcp-cs.UUCP Newsgroups: net.kids Subject: Re: Temper Tantrums Message-ID: <7328@umcp-cs.UUCP> Date: Sat, 2-Jun-84 02:16:05 EDT Article-I.D.: umcp-cs.7328 Posted: Sat Jun 2 02:16:05 1984 Date-Received: Tue, 5-Jun-84 07:54:02 EDT References: <810@trwrb.UUCP> Organization: Univ. of Maryland, Computer Science Dept. Lines: 21 We take the attitude that when our children are attempting to get attention there is a good reason for it. Ignoring such attempts (in our opinion) leads to a feeling in the child (and later adult) that he or she is not worth listening to, and perhaps even not worthy. Don't be afraid of listening to a tantrum, and telling your child all through the screaming that you love them. It will feel hard to you, because probably no one listened to your tantrums. But by sticking it out, the following good things happen: your child gets good exercise, your child knows you will stick by them and that your love is not conditional on certain behaviors but unconditional (I think this last is important but perhaps others disagree), you get to practice patience, you get to spend time with your child (it may not seen fun to you, but the reading "Peter Rabbit" the 10th in one day isn't much fun either. Your child likes it.) Listening to a tantrum is not encouraging more of them, in my experience with this method on two daughters, one now 2 and one now 6. -- Spoken: Mark Weiser ARPA: mark@maryland CSNet: mark@umcp-cs UUCP: {seismo,allegra}!umcp-cs!mark