Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.1 6/24/83; site decwrl.UUCP Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!floyd!harpo!decvax!decwrl!rhea!mariah!lipp From: lipp@mariah.DEC (Nicki Lipp CX01-1/N14 594-2320) Newsgroups: net.women Subject: Re: Women after marriage Message-ID: <6419@decwrl.UUCP> Date: Thu, 22-Mar-84 11:12:06 EST Article-I.D.: decwrl.6419 Posted: Thu Mar 22 11:12:06 1984 Date-Received: Fri, 23-Mar-84 20:43:42 EST Organization: DEC Engineering Network Lines: 47I don't believe it is the woman's view of sex that changes when she marries, but rather the expectations of the man towards the woman. Being married for 2 years, I have not lost any 'love' nor attraction towards my husband. The 'lust' we experience before marriage can be attributed to 2 factors: 1) the newness of the relationship o this makes it all the more exciting to explore new people. 2) knowing there are constraints and it won't go too far o women brought up in a restrictive environment will refrain from intercourse until married (in general, not all!) It is rather difficult for me to adjust to a casual attitude towards sex. The reason? I was brought up in a VERY strict environment and it is very hard to change an attitude which has been ingrained for 21 years. It is like saying: "It was wrong yesterday (to have intercourse), but I got married today, so it's okay now" There is not the same type of relationship between partners once they are married. I read an interesting article in a local newspaper which did a survey on this very same topic. A woman would rather be cuddled and kissed more often than have sex. Premarrital sex for most of the women consisted of just that--cuddling and kissing. A men (in general now!) would rather have sex. It is much more pleasing to them. To avoid the conflict in expectations, the women is less likely to provoke lovemaking. It is a difference in expectations. I am not saying this is right or wrong. These are the fact from a survey and *personal experience*! One the second question of shorter hair. I don't think that has anything to do with the marriage! I know more people who have grown their hair out once they were married (take myself for an example). The only reason I can think of that a women would cut her hair after marriage is that she has less time to take care of it and style it. Her lifestyle has changed! What about men who start dressing sloppily and let their weight and figure go after they are married???? Come on now! ------------ I'll sign-----Nicki