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From: dja@mi-cec.UUCP (Dave J. Aronson)
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: long stupid joke (the best kind!)
Message-ID: <125@mi-cec.UUCP>
Date: Fri, 22-Jul-83 17:26:11 EDT
Article-I.D.: mi-cec.125
Posted: Fri Jul 22 17:26:11 1983
Date-Received: Sat, 23-Jul-83 04:36:14 EDT
Lines: 66


	A rather long and poor joke, told to me by a friend a few
years ago:


        Three men met on vacation in Scotland. Each  man  noticed
that  the  other  two  were  also carrying bagpipes, with tartans
identical to his own!  They soon discovered that they were  long-
lost  relatives,  having been willed the bagpipes by their great-
great-grandfather.  Needless  to  say,  they  soon  became   good
friends,  travelling  everywhere together, and usually taking the
bagpipes with them.

        Eventually, the vacation ended and they  all  had  to  go
back  to work.  The visited each other frequently at their places
of employment, always bringing the  bagpipes.  They  became  even
more  dirty  and  tattered over the years, but they still carried
them as a sign of their fast friendship.

        One day, they were at the first man's workplace. He was a
biologist.   They were watching a detached frog's leg kick when a
particularly clumsy grad student knocked over  a  stack  of  germ
cultures, right onto the bagpipes!  They managed to clean most of
it off, but it left noticeable stains.

        The next week, the other two visited the  second  man,  a
chemist,  in  his  lab.  As  they  were brewing tea over a bunsen
burner, another particularly clumsy grad student knocked  over  a
rack  of  chemicals,  right  onto  the bagpipes!  They managed to
clean them off before it ate any holes, but it left stains.

        A while later, the third, a radiologist, received a visit
at  the  hospital. While he was making some adjustments on the x-
ray machine, yet another particularly clumsy grad student  nudged
the  "on"  switch,  spraying  a highly concentrated dose of high-
energy radiation right at the bagpipes!

        "At least we don'a have to  clean  'em  off  this  time!"
flamed   MacDonald.
        "Aye,  but  look  a'   'em!   They're  movin'!"  wondered
MacDougal.
        "It's alive!" screamed MacDoan.

        A large amorphous beast, covered in  the  family  tartan,
with  eight  legs  and a beak with two loud droning nostrils, got
off the table and scurried out of the room. After a  while  spent
in shock, one spoke.

        "'A think 'A know where 'tis! 'T'll be down by th'  loch,
sittin'  on  i's eggs!" announced MacDougal.
        "Eggs? Will i' na' be  nursin'  i's  young?"  asked  Mac-
Donald.
        "What're ye talkin', laddies? Wha's goin' on?" questioned
MacDoan.

        Sure enough, that's where it was. They  snuck  up  on  it
with  nets,  captured  it, and sold it to the zoo, as the world's
first and only plaid-billed octopus.


	Please don't flame about technical details...

		-Dave Aronson
		idis!mi-cec!dja
		da2p%cmcctd@cmuc
		(412) 682-9580