From: utzoo!decvax!microsof!fluke!vax2:sysate
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Title: Seattle Jokes Part 1
Article-I.D.: vax2.453
Posted: Tue Feb 15 08:53:42 1983
Received: Sun Feb 20 12:45:19 1983

The following is the first of a series of topical Seattle jokes. They
are shamelessly plagiarized from "the Weekly" issue dated Feb. 9, 1983.
Seattle fans enjoy.

GREAT BIG MOMENTS IN SEATTLE HISTORY

March 29, 1869

	The women of Seattle take a vote and decide they don't want the
right to vote. The vote is unanimous.

June 1876

	The city raises $2,100 and buys its first fire engine, the
"Always Ready". The Fire Department buys four dozen hats and belts. A
fire breaks out on First Avenue South. The firemen race to the fire
with their hats and belts - and forget the fire engine back in the
garage.

August 1895

	Mark Twain comes to town. Later, he cracks: "One of the nicest
winters I ever spent was a summer I had on Puget Sound."

Summer 1935

	The Ferry System unveils its pride and joy: the Kalakala, which
means "bird" (or more precisely "goose") in Chinook. On a sunny day,
you could see it from outer space: a shiny steel slug oozing a trail
across Elliot Bay. Though it rattles like a pailful of rivets, there is
not one rivet or bolt in its 276-foot solid-weld body. Thanks to its
solid-state chassis, "you could die of asphyxiation in there in ten
seconds," says one observer. Later, the Kalakala gets turned into an
Alaska fish plant; in 1983 it's sold for scrapola. An admirer sadly
recalls: "It always looked like it could've flown, but those wings on
the side were much too small. It looked like a sick little bee stuck
out there on the water."

Spring 1981

	Senate Democratic staffer Blair Butterworth, discussing
turncoat Democratic legislator Peter von Riechbauer, notes that "when
they circumsized him, they threw away the wrong part."

Craig Smith