From: utzoo!decvax!genradbo!wjh12!mjl Newsgroups: net.jokes Title: Another Shaggy Dog Story Article-I.D.: wjh12.135 Posted: Fri Jan 14 15:35:32 1983 Received: Sat Jan 15 08:21:38 1983 It seems that once upon a time in the depths of Darkest Africa there lived a race of small people who called themselves Trids. The Trids lived at the foot of a mountain, and were a merry folk (about 3 feet tall) who wanted nothing more than to enjoy their lives. The Trids did have one unusual custom, however: their ancient and venerable legends told them that each year, two days before the Spring Equinox, they must climb up the mountain and down the other side to worship their harvest gods. Therein lies the problem, for at the top of the mountain lived a huge, mean, and terrible ogre with a sadistic sense of humor. Every year the Trids would climb the mountain, only to be met at the top by the ogre, who would promptly boot them down the mountain with his size 34 foot, and they would roll down the mountain and go *SPLAT* against a tree at the base, simultaneously spoiling their whole day and making a terrible mess of the village. The Trids tried everything to get by the ogre -- bribes, threats, compliments, everything. But the result was always the same: climb...boot...roll...*SPLAT*! Finally, the Trids decided that since this was essentially a religious problem, they would recruit a man of religion to help out. They tried every religious type they could think of -- witch doctors and shaamans, Episcopalian and Lutheran, Greek and Russian Orthodox, and one year the Pope himself came to try to lead the Trids over the mountain. It was all to no avail. Climb...boot...roll...*SPLAT*! At last, when the Trids were nearly ready to give up, a Jewish rabbi happenned by the village. They quickly explained their problem and, as it was only two days before the Spring Equinox, they asked if he would not try to lead them over the mountain. The rabbi agreed, and they set off immediately. They climbed to the top of the mountain and, as you might expect by now, the ogre was there to meet them. "What, you guys again?" he asked. "Don't you ever give up?" And so saying, he reached down and plucked the rabbi from the ground by his collar, put him carefully aside, and proceeded to boot the Trids from the mountain whereupon they rolled down to the base of the mountain and went *SPLAT* against the tree (which by now was getting pretty tired of the whole business.) Meanwhile, at the top of the mountain, the rabbi was puzzled. "Oh great, mean, and terrible ogre with a sadistic sense of humor," he asked "why is it that you boot the Trids from off the mountain, but you let me remain?" And the ogre replied: "Silly rabbi, kicks are for Trids." Matt Landau (...decvax!genradbolton!wjh12!mjl) (...decvax!wivax!linus!wjh12!mjl) (...mhuxi!wjh12!mjl)