From: utzoo!decvax!wivax!dyer Newsgroups: net.singles Title: Re: Telepathy II Article-I.D.: wivax.6664 Posted: Mon Feb 14 02:12:32 1983 Received: Wed Feb 16 03:31:42 1983 References: mitccc.304 I don't want to sound pessimistic, and all the others' comments on "telepathy" were very good (i.e. ask your partner if it's appropriate) BUT Often, acting bored, being busy, not returning phone calls, etc. is a real signal that the other person just isn't interested. My own experience is that if I get a whiff of this behavior, and I'm not close enough to just come out and ask, I cool down. If I'm wrong, I'll hear from them again. If not, well, just as well--no use beating a dead horse. The key is knowing when to call it. Generally, a combination of consistent disinterest (in any of its myriad forms) without any explicit evidence to the contrary, tells you its time to give it up. I mean, it's one thing if she's real busy, but whenever you talk you sense some spark of interest and enjoyment. But it's quite another if she's busy and she's never given you more than her refusals. I think that often the problem isn't so much lacking "telepathy", as being unwilling to trust one's own innate appraisal of the situation when it disagrees with what we'd like to have. /Steve Dyer