From: utzoo!decvax!harpo!floyd!vax135!ariel!hou5f!hou5b!hou5c!hou5e!hou5a!hou5d!houxz!ihnp4!ihldt!luchs Newsgroups: net.singles Title: re: Women Only Article-I.D.: ihldt.1348 Posted: Thu Feb 24 15:32:02 1983 Received: Fri Feb 25 05:39:24 1983 Reply-To: luchs@ihldt.UUCP (S. Luchs) In response to Hennessy's questionaire (dated Feb 19th): Q: If you were at a social gathering with your girlfriends and you noticed that a guy, by himself, looked interested in you what would YOU do? A: First of all, how can you tell that someone is interested in you? I'm pretty slow to catch on to that sort of thing. At a New Year's party, I talked to someone I found interesting (JG). JG had to leave early to go to another party. I had no idea he was interested in ME (EVERYONE at the party talked to me--not just him). I left the party early, too (to go dancing with some friends). After I left, he called the host of the party to see if I was still around, but did not leave his name. When I talked to the host the next day, he told me somebody called looking for me. I assumed it was my ex(?)boyfriend trying to check up on me! I had no idea that JG was calling calling for me! But suppose that I DID realize (by whatever magical means) that a man was interested in me? I would simply walk up to him, start a conversation, and ask him out (if he didn't get to it first). Q: Do you feel that a relationship has to be started by the guy? A: I have often asked men out. I haven't had any refusals yet, but I go through the old "fear of rejection syndrome" EVERYTIME. On the other hand, it takes them by surprise and they are often flattered that a woman would ask them out. Q: Are you the type of person that goes out looking for a man or one that hopes he'll come to you? A: I used to be the type that went out looking for a man, but lately I have been a little "gun-shy" (with good reason, but that's another story). At this point I am not at all "desperate" to find someone, so I've just been checking out whatever passes by. (Unless reading net.singles counts as looking.) At this point I would rather just be getting to know a lot of men as FRIENDS and take my time to pick and choose who I get INVOLVED with. Once I start "going out" with someone, I feel that my freedom to meet other men becomes a bit more limited. Anyway, I'm getting off the subject here. If I go any further this is going to become a discussion of multiple relationships. Q: What type of signals do you use if you want to tell a guy that you are interested in him? A: I just talk to him. Smile. Perhaps touch him (nothing TOO overt). Q: If a man looks interested in you but you aren't attracted to him, what would you do? A: Body language is automatic. Before I even realize what I am doing, I have flashed that "I'm not interested" glance and turned away. Q: What does a man have to do to be noticed by you in a large social gathering (such as a bar or party)? A: Again, it all comes back to starting up a conversation. What else can you do when you first meet someone? Well, actually I did have a man I had never met before come up to me and say "I saw you standing there and I just had to give you a hug!" I thought that was a pretty good opening line (and hug). It worked. Q: What about in a place that is usually quiet i.e. classroom or office? A: The office is a great place to meet people. We don't work every second of the day, you know! One MOTOS who had never seen me before yelled "Hey, why don't you come back here and say Hi!" I have been going out with him off and on ever since (about 2.5 years). But that's another story... Sarah