From: utzoo!decvax!duke!harpo!uwvax!reid
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Title: For vegetarians..
Article-I.D.: uwvax.499
Posted: Fri Jul 23 00:50:33 1982
Received: Sun Jul 25 23:51:28 1982



A guy in a bar has had quite a few drinks, and the bartender decides that he
won't serve the guy any more.  "Tell you what, bartender," the guy says, "if I
can walk up to that dartboard over there and throw three perfect bull's eyes
from twice the normal distance, will you serve me then?"  Of course the
bartender knew the guy couldn't handle it, so he said, "Not only will I serve
you, but the drink will be on the house and we'll give you a prize, to boot."

Well, the man staggers up to the dartboard and to the amazement of everyone
watching, throws three perfect bull's eyes.  The bartender is pretty amazed,
himself.  The guy sits down for his drink and says, "say, what about that prize
you offered me?"  The bartender hadn't really thought about it, but he noticed
the terrarium that had been behind the bar since before he could remember, so
he reached in and gave the guy a turtle that was in there.  The man stuffed the
turtle into his coat pocket, finished his drink, and left.

About a week later, the same man comes into the bar again, and the same
scenario arises; except that this time he seems to be twice as drunk as the last
time.  Well, he manages to connive the bartender into the same deal as the
previous time, and, sure enough, manages to hit three perfect bull's eyes.
The bartender was scrounging to come up with some piece of junk to give the guy
as a prize when the man piped up and offered:  "I'll tell you what, bartender,
how about another roast beef sandwich like last week, but don't put it on such
stale bread . . . ."

Ugh.