| [MSTing] Harry Potter and the Senshi's Circle [SM/HP/Ronin Warriors/DBZ] - Part 4 [message #44389] |
Fri, 22 March 2013 23:16 |
Freezer
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> Ch. 4
>
> It's like rain on your wedding day,
>
> It's a free ride and you're already there.
>
> It's the good advice that you just didn't take,
>
> And who would've thought it figures?
>
> -Alanis Morissette, of course.
TRACE : So what the hell does that have to do with anything? You
decide, folks!
> "I see we have our new celebrities in class."
FRANK : Uh oh: It's a Potter/One Direction crossover!
> Snape's voice was cold, soft and cruel. His cold dark eyes flicked
> over the Senshi seated in his class.
>
> "I will not abide showing off. I treat everyone here like a regular
> student, as Mr. Potter can easily testify." Sailormoon saw Harry's
> cheeks burn.
>
> "Now. Sailorchibimoon,
JOEL : [Snape] No... No... I refuse to keep calling this girl
"Sailorchibimoon." You have a name, don't you?
> could you tell me what seasonal plant is good for poison potions?"
MARY JO: Is it the "Summer Instant Death Squash?"
> "Which season, sir?" Chibimoon asked cautiously. Snape's eyes
> glittered, but not with fury. It was more something along the lines
> of amusement.
>
> "That would be the Yuletide season, Chibimoon."
JOSH : [Chibiusa] I... don't know what that is. Japanese,
remember?
> "I believe it would be the holly plant, as its leaves and
> especially its berry are quite poisonous."
>
> Snape looked at her very carefully, and Sailormoon was sure she saw
> a tiny smile tug at the corners of his mouth.
>
> "Correct," he said after a moment. "Twenty points to Gryffindor."
>
> There was a sharp intake of breath. Snape had just awarded points
> to Gryffindor!! Somewhere deep in the earth, the temperature was
> dropping quickly, Harry was sure.
MARY JO: Five bucks says Dumbledore put a "Don't be a dick to the
Japanese girls" spell on him.
> Snape began the lesson, picking on the Gryffindor Senshi for almost
> every question, and ignoring Hermione's often airborne hand.
>
> To everyone's surprise/relief (on the part of the other
> Gryffindors), the Senshi picked up on every single question,
> earning Gryffindor no less than 170 points. Ron was bug-eyed when
> the left the class.
FRANK : [Ron] It's almost like he was a teacher or something!
> "I don't believe it!" he gasped. "Snape was fair! He didn't pick on
> Neville! He gave us points! I think the Slytherins may die of
> shock."
>
> "Only after you," Hermione laughed.
>
> Ron had a point as many Slytherins were quite silent after the
> potions lesson. What had happened to the cruel and unjust head of
> their house?? He'd acted like...like...well, like Professor
> McGonagall, that's who! Malfoy frowned.
>
> "What happened?"
JOEL : [Draco] What happened to our home field advantage?
JOSH : That is a very good question. A better question is "Will
we actually find out?"
> "Two more feet to go!" Sailormoon wailed. She let her History of
> Magic homework roll back up with a veritable sproing and flopped
> back into a chair in the Gryffindor Common Room. Hermione smiled.
>
> "You'll get it, Sailormoon. As it is, you're doing remarkably well.
> Five feet is really an accomplishment."
MARY JO: [Hermione] But I don't think making all your characters
four inches square is going to fly.
> "Perhaps, but it's not seven feet." Sailormoon sighed. "I want my
> Mamo-chan," she muttered in Japanese. Chibimoon glanced up slyly.
TRACE : I'm not entirely sure what's going on there, but I'm
pretty sure I want you to stop.
> "Don't you mean my Mamo-chan?" She challenged. Within a few
> seconds, the argument had escalated to the point where Sailormoon
> had begun to chase Chibimoon around the room waving her sceptre at
> her menacingly. Venus sighed and gave an embarrassed smile to the
> dumbfounded Harry, Ron and Hermione.
>
> "Now they're starting to settle in."
JOEL : Translation: You don't wanna know.
> They watched as Chibimoon taunted the enraged Sailormoon through
> the portrait hole and out of sight. After a few minutes, Hermione
> sighed.
>
> "We'd better go after them before Filch finds them," she sighed.
> Venus frowned. "Judging from the way they were running, they could
> be anywhere. How would we find them?"
FRANK : "Follow the screaming" would be a good start.
> Harry glanced at Ron and Hermione, both of whom grinned. Harry ran
> upstairs into the boy's dormitory. When he had emerged again, he
> held a piece of old parchment in his hand and there was a slight
> lump under his clothes.
MARY JO: Oh, Harry, no! Put that away!
TRACE : Or wear a looser robe.
JOEL : [Hermione] Looks like it's Icewaterus Downthepantsus time.
> "Let's get out of here first," he muttered, gesturing towards the
> portrait hole.
JOSH : [Venus] I'm not going anywhere with you until you
"dismantle the big top" there.
> They all climbed out and had walked a little ways before Harry took
> out what had been under his robes.
ALL : NOOOOO!
> Venus gasped as
ALL : *NOOOOOO!*
> the silvery cloak was presented.
ALL : Oh...
> "Nani desu ka?"
FRANK : Japanese for "Da' hell?"
> she asked under her breath in amazement. Harry smiled.
TRACE : She's seen wonders from actual other worlds, yet she's
gobsmacked by really shiny silk.
> "It's an invisibility cloak. And this," he said, taking out the
> piece of parchment. "Is a map of Hogwarts."
>
> He looked around cautiously then placed the tip of his wand onto
> the parchment.
>
> "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good," he said and a spider
> web of lines started from his wand tip across the paper until
> before them was a map of Hogwarts. On the third floor were four
> dots, labelled "Sailorvenus", "Hermione Granger", "Ronald Weasley"
> and "Harry Potter". Venus grinned.
JOSH : It's showing "Sailorvenus", not "Minako Aino." Sure.
Whatever, fanfic.
> "Cool," she whispered. Her eyes scanned for two specific dots. She
> found them racing through the dungeons up towards the Great Hall.
> Venus smiled.
>
> "We may be able to head them off. Let's go."
>
> "Just a sec," Harry said. He placed his wand tip on the map.
> "Mischief Managed" and the map wiped clean. He then threw the
> invisibility cloak over them and they all set off towards the Great
> Hall.
FRANK : How many bad porn fics have included the words "he then
threw the invisibility cloak over them?"
> They edged their way past portraits snoozing in their frames and
> twice went through unsuspecting ghosts. They reached the Great Hall
> in time to hear the shrill angry voices of Moon and Chibimoon
> echoing towards them from the direction of the dungeons. They
> waited as the voices quickly drew nearer...then suddenly stopped. A
> few seconds later, they heard footsteps running towards them. Venus
> threw off the invisibility cloak and ran to them. Both of their
> faces were flushed and a little panicked.
MARY JO: [Chibimoon] Filch... Dancing... Naked... Oh God!
> '"What is it?" Venus asked, stopping Sailormoon. "What's wrong?"
>
> "It's Peeves," Sailormoon whispered. "He's on the stairwell...he's
> turned to stone!"
>
> By the next day, word had, of course, spread all over the school.
> People were worried. Was this the work of the Slytherin Heir again?
> Hermione had quickly dismissed that possibility.
>
> "The basilisk only petrified ghosts and people, and yes, killed
> them," she had updated the Senshi earlier. "But turned them to
> stone? That's not in its power."
JOEL : And there's he could've set up another creature to be set
loose.
> "A form of a medusa, then?" Sailormercury had asked. Harry shook
> his head.
>
> "They live in Greece."
>
> At this Sailormercury had sighed and had sent an owl to Touma
> asking him to scan the area around Hogwarts for any unusual
> activity pertaining to the Dark Kingdom. She'd have used her own
> computer, but one look at the static filled screen and she knew
> that'd be futile.
>
> "All we can do now is wait," Mercury had said. "I mean, there's
> nothing we can do. My computer is on the fritz, so I can't scan the
> area."
>
> "Electronic objects can't work here," Hermione said. "Too much
> magical interference. But Touma should have better luck."
JOSH : Isn't Mercury's computer magic as well?
TRACE : Yeah, but it's Magic Linux and Hogwarts runs on Mage OS.
> Mercury sighed. "Well, at any rate, I've got Herbology in a few
> minutes, I'm due down in Greenhouse 4."
>
> Uranus nodded. "That's just as well, the Gryffindors and
> Hufflepuffs are due in Divination."
>
> "Professor Trelawney," Harry rolled his eyes. "Wonder how I'm going
> to die this year."
FRANK : [Ron] It was "buggered by house elves" last year, wasn't
it?
> "Huh?" Chibimoon said, confused. Ron grinned. "We'll explain on the
> way. Hermione, off to Arithmancy?"
>
> Hermione smiled. "I wouldn't be caught dead in that stuffy oven she
> calls a classroom."
>
> Everyone split up and headed their separate ways.
>
> Sailorpluto fought the urge to cough as she ascended the rope
> ladder into the classroom. Turning, she pulled Neville the rest of
> the way up into the classroom, as she'd heard about the
> accident-prone student.
MARY JO: And trusted him not to look up her skirt the whole way.
> She turned and selected a comfortable-looking cushion in the
> corner, knowing that neither Haruka nor Michiru would appreciate
> being in the centre of the room. Sailorvenus, on the other hand,
> well....Pluto smiled to herself. She could be counted on to try to
> draw attention. It had always been the senshi's mark. She smiled
> gently as Uranus and Neptune sat next to her, and, of course, next
> to each other. She watched Sailormoon stumble into the room, nearly
> upsetting a collection of delicate-looking teacups that sat on a
> shelf and winced. Luckily she was caught by a fast-thinking Dean
> Thomas, and she didn't fall. Nodding her thanks to him, she sat on
> a cushion in more or less the centre of the classroom.
TRACE : The riveting "Everyone settles in" scene!
> Pluto noticed many students were reclining, or sitting. But the
> Senshi, all of them, for now all in the room were seated-were
> sitting Japanese style. She turned to Uranus.
>
> "This would be a nice place for a cha no yu, would it not?"
JOSH : [Uranus] I speak the language and I don't know what that
means.
JOEL : [scolding] Stop making up words!
> Uranus smirked. "It's too fancy. Too stuffy."
FRANK : [Uranus] Too British.
> "That kind of environment is good for other things, ne?" Neptune
> asked her softly. Uranus turned slightly pink and coughed a few
> times before turning her attention to the teacher-where had she
> come from??
MARY JO: [Neptune] And by "other things," I mean...
ALL : {Senshi] WE KNOW!
> "Good day, my young seers. Welcome to a new school year where you
> will gaze deep into the future and discover your destinies."
TRACE : [Trelawney] And learn to spout crap like this with a
straight face.
> Pluto frowned. This woman sounded like she knew nothing about
> messing with knowing the future and destinies. She felt rather than
> saw the gaze of the other Senshi in the room slide to her in order
> to get her reaction to this proclamation. She grinned in a
> self-satisfactory way and she knew the other Senshi were grinning
> too. Oh, they would have fun with this one.
JOEL : And the sign says "Gratuitous Mean Girlyness: 2 KM ahead."
> "It is possible, as you know," Professor Trelawney went on in her
> best psychic voice. "To see into the future with one's inner eye.
> We must first do exercises to relax our inner eye, and then we must
> appeal to the guardian of time to see if he, in his infinite
> wisdom, will-" she trailed off at the snickers emanating from the
> inner senshi.
>
> "Is something the matter?"
>
> "The guardian of time," Sailorvenus said respectfully through
> amused. "Isn't a he."
JOSH : [Pluto] Last time I checked, anyway.
> "Well of course he is," Professor Trelawney huffed. "I have met
> him."
>
> "Funny," Pluto said softly. "I don't remember being a he. Unless
> I've missed something."
FRANK : [Pluto] Well there was that one time. But alternate
universes don't count.
> Professor Trelawney's large eyes shifted to Pluto amidst muffled
> laughter. "You," she said most icily. "Are not the guardian of the
> gate of time."
MARY JO: [Pluto] Well someone should've told me earlier. I
would've had a lot more free time.
> Pluto's eyes narrowed. "I most certainly am," she said softly.
> Uranus and Neptune noted the dangerousness in her voice and scooted
> as far away from her as possible. Pluto continued. "And may I say,
> Baka-sama, that I have never beheld the likes of you nearing my
> time gate. You would not be worthy of entrance and would be
> eliminated." Her voice became a whisper. "Immediately." She stood,
> placing books into her bag. "Do not presume to know the guardian of
> time, Professor," she walked over to the trap door and opened it.
> "But I will make sure you get a good long look at me before I kick
> your sorry self back to your own time."
TRACE : [Trelawney] Wait, hold on a moment... If you really are
the true guardian of the gates of time, what in the name of Morgan
Le Fey's accursed taint are you doing slumming in a magic boarding
school? Don't you have WAY more important stuff to do? For that
matter, I'm just supposed to take your word that you are who you
claim to be? For all I know, Potter over there has just as much
claim to being the reincarnation of Merlin as you do to this. One
thousand points from Hufflepuff and get the hell out of my
classroom, you arrogant slag!
ALL : [Applause]
JOEL : Nicely done, Trace!
TRACE : Well, sometimes you get into a character's head, you know?
> She turned to the other senshi. "This idiot is too much for me,"
> she said in Japanese. "I'm going to be in the library if anyone
> needs me." With that, she left. Professor Trelawney was silent a
> moment. Snickers and giggles were being passed around the room.
> Chibimoon's eyes were wide.
>
> "I've never seen her so angry before!"
FRANK : Good thing this isn't a comics crossover. I think DC and
Marvel have like five time guardians apiece.
> "She can't stand idiocy," Venus told her.
JOSH : [Chibimoon] Then why does she hang around Usagi?
MARY JO: [Usagi] Eat me, Spore!
> "And trust me, this woman is dripping with it."
>
> Chibimoon grinned.
>
> "That was interesting," Uranus smiled over at Pluto. "Kicking her
> back, huh?"
JOEL : [Trelawney] You're still in my class, you know!
MARY JO: [Uranus] And?
> "I was tempted to say something more," she said softly. She had
> regained her composure. "But that would have been too vulgar, even
> in Japanese, for me to say to anyone. Except perhaps the Shogun.
ALL : Who?
TRACE : You know what? Never mind. Knowing would just lead to
more questions.
> "Understood and noted," Venus said, smiling. "There's one class you
> won't be going back to." She looked at her schedule.
>
> "I'd love to stay and chat, hontou, but I've got to go down to
> Charms. Professor Flitwick is nice, but he's not of infinite
> patience."
MARY JO: [Trelawney] So you're going to stand there? Disrupting my
class? Treating me like nothing? Fuck it. All the points from
Hufflepuff and Gryffindor. Sod all of you.
> Pluto smiled and sent Venus off after the rest of her housemates.
> She ran through a few shortcuts, hoping to end up in the charms
> corridor if the stairs didn't change position on her.
>
> She came out from behind a tapestry and gasped. There was a girl
> laying facedown on the ground. She turned the girl over to check
> for any injuries and let out a strangled yelp, backing away from
> the girl a bit. Her eyes were filled with an iridescent blue light,
> and they were staring. She felt her pulse. Still there. The girl
> was physically fine but obviously wasn't all there.
FRANK : Any resemblance to any other scene in the Harry Potter
verse is strictly coincidental.
> She saw that her wand, which was being clutched in her hand, had
> been turned to stone. Venus began to yell for help.
>
> "This isn't good," Mars said softly.
JOSH : And all of Hogwarts is struck down by a blinding flash of
the obvious.
> "I talked to Madam Pompfrey and she said that it was the same with
> both Peeves and the Ravenclaw second year you found, Minako-chan.
> They both had been drained of magical energy."
>
> "Of course," Mercury said softly. "Peeves is magical by nature, and
> so are witches and wizards."
>
> "But why her wand, and not her then?" Chibimoon asked. Mars sighed.
>
> "A wand is the centre of a person's magical energy. Ideally, the
> energy could be sucked out through it."
MARY JO: [Chibimoon] Look if you don't know, just say so. Don't
just make crap up.
> "So what do we do?" Jupiter asked. "We can't find out through
> Ami-chan's computer what's going on."
TRACE : Because Mercury’s computer was the only way you ever found
anything out ever.
> "We wait for Touma's report," Neptune said.
JOEL : Because he can find out more from three thousand miles
away than you guys can from the scene.
> "We can't do anything else.
FRANK : Our heroines, folks!
> And we keep our eyes open. Report any drains in magical energy we
> may see. I have a feeling this is turning into something big."
JOSH : One might argue that something that can take out a
poltergeist is already something big. But don't let me harsh the
buzz of your vague concern.
--
My name is Freezer and my anti-drug is porn.
http://freezer.livejournal.com/
http://mst3kfreezer.livejournal.com/
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